Like every 20-year-old, I watched "One Tree Hill" and fell in love not only with Julian Baker, but also with Brooke Davis. Not because she is beautiful and popular, but because of the words she spoke when she said, "I am who I am. No excuses." She had a rocky life: parents who didn't pay attention to her, rough relationships and a reputation as a notorious party girl. Yet somehow, she became a woman, wife and a mother that I admire even though she is a fictional character.
Growing up I knew who I wanted to be. I knew where I wanted to go in life and knew the journey wouldn't always be easy, but it would always be worth it. Over the years, I've given advice or been given advice that has simply changed my life. Maybe these pieces of advice it will change yours too.
1. Don't strive to be like someone else; strive to become the best version of yourself. As cliche as it sounds we all compare ourselves to each other, we all wish we had something someone else had, we all wish we were more than what we are.
2. You are more than just a stereotype. You are just more. Maybe you're the cheerleader, the smart girl, the one who plays soccer or maybe you are the party girl. It doesn't matter who you are and it doesn't matter what people say because the only person who truly knows you is yourself. So let the haters hate. One day you'll appreciate the negativity because it made you stronger.
3. Stop giving people multiple chances to prove what you already know — they aren't worth it.
4. No matter where life takes you, always appreciate the journey and the person you became because of the obstacles you overcame.
5. You aren't the same person you were in high school and I doubt you'll be the same person five years from now. So make mistakes and learn from those mistakes. Sometimes it's not the mistakes that define us, but how we overcame the mistakes we made.
6. Learn to respect God's timing because every season has a time and like that season, all the events in your life also have a time. Nothing comes too early or too late because God's timing always wins.
7. If you have to force it, then it's not going to work. Nope, never.
8. Don't strive for perfection. There are so many things to strive to be and perfect should not be one of them.
9. Accept Jesus into your Heart. No doubt, things in life are bound to get difficult and when it does, fall back on prayer. Have a fighting heart and faith to keep on going no matter how hard things are. Trust in the Lord with all that you have because if you do, you might just be surprised with how much strength you end up having.
10. Don't be afraid to cut some people loose. Also don't be afraid for people not to like you. The truth of the matter is, not everyone will like you and it's okay — let it be.
11. I cannot say this enough. Fall in love with yourself before you go looking for someone to fall in love with you. There are all kinds of people in this world; some of them will want to destroy you, some will hate you for no reason, some will pretend to like you or love you and lie behind your back. None of that matters —what does is the love you have for yourself. Loving yourself means you walk away from anyone who doesn't give you what you deserve. Loving yourself means you're honest and you don't care what others think. Loving yourself is more than any kind of love someone else could give you.
12. I believe love can move mountains. I believe spreading hate and being negative doesn't do this world any good. Be kinder to others even when it is hard to. Trust me it's something you will learn to be grateful for.
13. If you want something, or if you want someone, go for it. If you sit there and let time, distance or doubt control your life, then you'll never live. There will always be something or someone right there waiting to stop you so either sit on the sidelines and wait, or get your butt up and play the game.
14. Be like a fine wine, only getting better with age. Don't regret any of the choices you made because at the end of the day, you chose to make them and that's the best thing about being in control of your life: making mistakes and owning them.
15. Learn to roll with the punches. If you get knocked down — which you will — get up again and keep going. Don't give up because the road got tough. Life is like riding a bike (which I never learned to do, but I watched my brother fall a couple of times while I laughed.. I was that sister). You are going to fall a lot, it is going to hurt and you'll probably get some bruises — and that's okay. Living a life with no scars is boring.
16. Be positive. It's as simple as that.
17. Remember a house is just a building, but a home is a feeling.
18. Learn to love change. Yeah, it's not something many people like, but I promise, change is good.
19. Here's the biggest lesson I had to learn:Your 18-year-old body is not the same as your 20-something-year old body. You will change, your weight will fluctuate and you just have to accept and embrace who you are because you are beautiful. Every size is beautiful.
20. Live your life, live your dreams and explore the endless possibilities of this world.
