Donald Trump's candidacy is simultaneously the most ridiculous and the scariest thing to happen to American politics. Whenever he opens his mouth, I think one of two things: "This is laugh out loud funny," or "Welp, Hitler." However, I've been doing my research about the Fuhrer Republican front runner and I stumbled across an article that lists why Trump should be president. I've decided that a lot of the reasons people love Trump are the reasons we should, instead, elect Sacha Baron Cohen, the genius behind such wonders as "Da Ali G Show," "Borat," "Bruno," "The Dictator" and his new movie, "The Brothers Grimsby." Here's why:

1. "He isn't your ordinary politician."

This is pretty obvious, given that Cohen is an actor. But I contend that Sacha Baron Cohen is a secret politician. He's gotten sit-downs with countless politicians, including Alan Keyes, presidential advisers, the old dude from the LifeAlert commercials and he even tried to seduce Ron Paul for fuck's sake. That's pretty far from ordinary.

2. "Trump isn't reliant on donors."

Well, neither is Sacha Baron Cohen. In fact, in his latest movie, "The Brothers Grimsby," there is a scene in which Donald Trump accidentally contracts HIV. Sony, the movies distributor, literally tried to sabotage the movie by not advertising it and subtly tried to make it disappear. Mark it a win for Trump, correct? Incorrect. SBC has still been promoting the movie on his own and has been doing a damn good job.

3. "He doesn't have much of a filter."

Anyone who's heard or seen anything Sacha Baron Cohen has ever done knows that he makes Trump look like Helen Keller in comparison. Don't believe me? Just YouTube search "Sacha Baron Cohen Jew/gay/Islam" and you'll be in for some real treats.

4. "There is an establishment plot against him."

Sacha Baron Cohen's movie quite literally was blackballed because he made fun of the wrong old white dudes. Does that sound like his very establishment? Nicht nicht. Plus, does this look like a guy who supports the establishment?

5. "African-Americans love him.

Breitbart seems to think that Trump is a hit among black voters (I think they're wrong but they're the experts on the internet, I'm just Larry). Even if that's true, I don't think anyone will be able to come close to Sacha Baron Cohen when it comes to getting black voters energized.

BONUS:

Remember, don't vote Trump and go see "The Brothers Grimsby" in theaters starting Friday, March 11!