I think in college a lot of people fall in to this mentality that the more friends you have, the better. However, I find myself being quite the opposite. I like having my close-knit group of friends and being able to go to them for anything. With that said, it does get frustrating when I find myself always being the one to initiate plans with certain people I am friends with. Not only that, but I also find that if I do not text them, I will not hear from them for several weeks.
Now, at this point, you might be thinking that these people I am referring to just don’t really want to be friends with me. Honestly, I have had that thought once or twice as well. However, contrary to popular belief, these are the same people that when I see them we act like we are best friends; we vent to each other, laugh continuously and share some amazing memories together. When we are together, everything is awesome and as hard as it is to believe, the feelings are genuine. So, did I just pick friends that are bad communicators? Or simply really busy? I am honestly not sure. Something I do know is I feel like a lot of people have either been in this situation or been on the other end. Thus, I want to give some advice to those on the other end.
Being someone’s friend is way more than just posting Instagram pictures with them and sending them well wishes on their birthday. It is about being there for that person and letting the know that you care about them. It is about replying to their text messages and phone calls in a timely fashion and recognizing that it’s not cool to continuously use the excuse that you are busy. We are all in college and we are all busy.
Likewise, part of being someone’s friend is making them a priority. I am not saying place your friends on top of school or work because that is not necessarily very wise. I am saying that when school and work are over, going on your phone and checking in on someone you claim that you care about is important. If there is one thing that I have learned about relationships it is that they are never successful if they are one sided.
If there is one thing that I want you to take away from this article, it is that if you truly care about someone and if you truly want them in your life in the long run, you have to put the effort in to maintain your relationship with them. You have to make them a priority and, at some point, recognize where you might have made mistakes throughout your relationship. Otherwise, those people, like me, who are continuously reaching out and trying to make your relationship work, will stop one day. And honestly, writing that last line makes me sad because I really do want to make it work.