I know what it’s like to wake up and wish that when you opened your eyes, it was all a dream. I know what it’s like to avoid looking in the mirror when you brush your teeth because you’re embarrassed to see who you’ve become. I know what it’s like to be afraid of taking showers because you are forced to be alone with the one thing you despise most in the world, your body. I know what it’s like to stare into your closet, wrapped in your towel and want to cry because you know that no matter what you choose to put on, you’ll look fat in. I’m here to tell you that you are not alone.
When you wake up in the morning, be happy you are alive. When you walk in front of a mirror smile. Because the girl looking back is the girl who chose to get out of bed this morning, against every voice in her head telling her nobody would notice she was gone. When you go to shower admire yourself because just like the song says, your body is a wonderland. Your body is a temple and, like it or not, it is a strong work of art that you get to strut around in every day.
When you look down at your belly and start to hate yourself because of your stretch marks, remember that each and every one of those are little bolts of lightning shooting from your skin. When you stand in front of your closet looking at your extensive wardrobe, pick what you like - not what others will find appropriate. If you want to wear a skirt and a crop top, but are scared because the last time you did you got a rude comment about it, throw it on. Remember that if crop tops and short skirts weren’t made for big girls, they wouldn’t make them in our size.
The hardest part about being a big girl in a skinny world is the fact that we are programmed to think that, because we have a little more body mass, we deserve a little less respect and should be forced to wear a little more clothing. I say we do what makes us comfortable. If they don’t like it they can buy our clothes. Confidence comes from within, but it’s not something that comes overnight. You can’t buy self-love and you definitely can’t get it from anyone else. We don’t all think the same. Just because I find it easy to walk out of the house half naked doesn’t mean you have to be.
Learning to love yourself is a journey and a long one at that. It is essential when wanting to be the happiest most genuine version of yourself you can be - and we all have to start somewhere. If you were looking for a sign that you should start soon, look no further because here it is. You’re welcome.
