It has been well over a year since we last spoke, and I would be lying if I said that I haven’t thought of you once. You pop into my head every once in a while, especially when I listen to an old Hannah Montana song or pass by a place where we used stuff our faces with the unhealthiest of foods. Remember when our teenage metabolisms could actually handle greasy cheese fries and chicken strips on a semi-daily basis? I would do anything to go back to that—back to when everything was so simple.

I remember the first time we met. We were itty bitty ones then, and I had no idea that the little girl who stood so quietly before me in line would play such a significant role in shaping the person I would become. When we were 5 years old, you told me that you would be my best friend tomorrow, and you kept that promise for so many years after. From childhood to late adolescence, you were my best friend.

We were best friends during the most significant moments of growing up. I remember your rainy birthdays that we celebrated at Disneyland and the shopping adventures after going to McDonald's for chicken nuggets and fries. I remember the many sleepovers and pool parties we had your house. I remember the first time we shaved our legs and both of our first kisses. I remember getting ready for football games and figuring out how much eyeliner was actually too much. I remember the first time you thought you were in love and the first time you cried because a boy broke your heart. I remember crying to you after multiple fights with my parents, and I remember staying on the phone for hours as you cried when yours fought. I remember the many homecomings and proms when we tried to look so much older than we actually were, and I remember those lazy summers when we would nap together and eat frozen yogurt. I remember most everything about our friendship—the good, the bad, and everything in between.

A friendship like ours does not simply vanish overnight. We were struggling, and we both knew it, and then college happened. I moved away from home, and for the first time, we weren’t just a seven-minute drive away from each other. In an attempt to balance 8 a.m. classes, various clubs, and new friends, I immersed myself in my new environment. In a way, this meant distancing myself from you. Our schedules conflicted, and it seemed like we were playing a constant game of phone tag. That first year apart was a challenge, but it truly was the second year that broke us. At this point, we were more than just a simple phone call away. New interests, new people and relationships, new hobbies—all of these created the greatest distance between us, and in the end, our friendship simply wasn’t strong enough to withstand all of this.

Neither of us was perfect, but after so many years of friendship, our unspoken arguments had accumulated into a disastrous breakup. At first, I was angry. How could so many years of friendship end with such a bitter parting? However, this anger was the fuel I needed to really analyze our relationship. Once our friendship ended, I realized that neither of us was exactly the best of friends we could have been. There were times when our friendship seemed more like a competition, and often, one of us was always trying to outshine the other. We only ever fought silently and never actually let our hurtful words reach other. We gossiped and allowed a passive aggressive tension to linger when we should have communicated our frustrations. We were young and immature, and looking back without regret, I now see that our friendship was destined to end one way or another.

You were my best friend, and you taught me more lessons than you’ll ever really know. From you, I learned that the term "family" wasn’t solely exclusive to my own parents and siblings. Your parents became my own, and I know that my parents loved you like you were their own daughter. I learned how to soften my heart—that forgiveness and compassion are necessary to maintain healthy relationships in all areas of life. I learned to accept my own personality, and revel in what makes me most unique. In a way, you taught me to accept myself—physically, mentally, and emotionally—because it was you who made me feel most inadequate, and from this, I learned the most important lesson: to expect nothing but the best from the people I allow into my life. You showed me that friendship is a privilege rather than a guarantee, and that the phrase "quality over quantity" is used for a reason. You showed me everything that I wanted and deserved in a friend while simultaneously reminding me how I should act as a friend, and for all of these lessons, I am eternally grateful.

Sometimes I wish I wasn’t such a stubborn soul, but sometimes I also wish we had been better friends to each other. Of course it saddens me when people ask how you are and I can only say, "I don’t know." We were once an inseparable duo. Everyone thought we would be friends forever, but I accept that our friendship is over. However, I do not look back at our friendship with regret or malice because those years together were far from wasted. Please know that I want the best for you in everything that you do. I hope life is kind to you and places the best of friends on your path. Likewise, I hoped you learned just as much from our friendship as I did, but most of all, I hope you are happy.