To commit or not to commit... that is the question.

To some, a committed relationship may seem like a comforting thing. It’s a stagnant lifestyle for the time being and a sense of strong stability. It’s the assurance of emotional encouragement. It’s knowing there is someone who values your happiness and seeks to contribute to it. It’s the relief of a constant cuddle buddy, date goer and friend.

To me, a commitment seems like a terrifying obligation; a dead end; the conclusion of growth. This age is the prime time for experimenting. How can you discover the qualities you like or dislike in a person when you’re stuck with the same partner? We’re way too young to be settling down in such a declared way.

I’d definitely admit that my lack of luck in the romance world has contributed to my fear of committing. How many times can a person puncture her heart before they no longer believe in love? I’ve put myself out there too many times only to be left feeling disappointed and empty. I’ve lost count of the short-lived individuals I’ve pursued over the years who so easily discontinued whatever it was that we had. Moving on became my new habit. So did rejecting the seemingly well-intentioned potentials. My heartbroken self-turned heartless. This strategy took effect to prevent further heartbreak down the road. But as much as I claim I won’t fall for the next human to enter my life, my feelings override my mindset every damn time. My commitment phobia grows stronger with every temporary fix.

Through all of my flings the past couple of years I’ve learned a vast amount about myself and others. There are moments where I deeply wish I had one constant by my side– there to make my days a little brighter and my heart a little fuller. And sometimes I do get envious of those who have that solid rock to lean on. But I’ve realized that commitment is not for everyone. Not everyone is ready to settle down. Not everyone has found one worthy of settling down with. I applaud the couples who have, and additionally admire the people who have not. Both take a lot of strength. At the end of the day it’s about what you’re comfortable with.

I may get attached too easily and abandoned too frequently, but the lessons I’ve learned along the way have been incredible. Evasiveness isn’t so bad after all. I’ve had the opportunity to get to know so many different personalities. This is exciting to a person who is constantly craving change. Aside from enjoying the perks of the single life, I hope one day to fall head over heels in love with the right person and find satisfaction in being tied down. For now, I’ll embrace this time of my life and keep reminding myself that a lack of commitment is not a bad thing at all. It is a symbol of independence, freedom and exploration.

Do you now see the answer?