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10 Things I'd Rather Experience Than Witness The Yankees Lose To The Red Sox

Ask any baseball fan who their least favorite team is, and chances are, the answer would be the New York Yankees nine times out of ten.

Jessica Ma

Aug 14, 2018

University of Southern California

122

Wikimedia

As an unapologetic Yankees fan, this comes as no surprise: we're simply that great. Although my team has been faring decently this season, they were recently swept by their rival, the Boston Red Sox, losing all four games in a row. Now, there are plenty of tragic moments in sports history, but this was so tragic that here are some things I'd rather experience than witness that happening again.

1. Shove my hands in ice cold water

Compared to seeing the Red Sox score over 10 points? This is nothing.

2. Drink sriracha sauce

My spice tolerance is in the negatives, and I'd still rather do this. There's nothing a glass of cold milk can't fix.

3. Lose a sock from every pair I own

Losing a single game out of three or four games is fine, but the Yankees losing all four is like losing whole pairs of socks within days. At least single socks can be mixed and matched.

4. Eat a raw onion

Who cares about bad breath? Gum and mints can eradicate bad breath, but they can't stop the Yankees from losing four games in a row.

5. Run a lap in Texas summer heat

This one's exercise and therefore healthy anyways. Maybe if I train more it'll help the team I support win more. That's exactly how osmosis works.

6. Walk to the boba store only to find it closed

One less boba drink is $5 more dollars to fund my next baseball game. No loss here.

7. Trap myself in a room full of legos on the ground while barefoot

A little pain never hurt anyone, and this physical pain certainly hurts less than seeing the Red Sox play so well.

8. Sit through a three hour chemistry lecture

Even a monotone professor's voice can't numb the pain of losing so many times in a row and seeing our postseason chances diminishing.

9. Accidentally call my professor "mom"

At least it's a term of endearment. I see the classroom as my home.

10. Become a Patriots fan for a day

Just kidding, nothing can be worse than this.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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10 Things I'd Rather Experience Than Witness The Yankees Lose To The Red Sox

Ask any baseball fan who their least favorite team is, and chances are, the answer would be the New York Yankees nine times out of ten.

1. Shove my hands in ice cold water

2. Drink sriracha sauce

3. Lose a sock from every pair I own

4. Eat a raw onion

5. Run a lap in Texas summer heat

6. Walk to the boba store only to find it closed

7. Trap myself in a room full of legos on the ground while barefoot

8. Sit through a three hour chemistry lecture

9. Accidentally call my professor "mom"

10. Become a Patriots fan for a day

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The Best Lines from the Fab Four

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful and so are you

Love is old, love is new, love is all, love is you

There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be

Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend

He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Oh please, say to me, You'll let me be your man. And please say to me, You'll let me hold your hand

It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play. They've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see

Can you hear me? When it rains and shine, it's just a state of mind

Little darling, it's been long cold lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it' s been here. Here comes the sun, Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright

We danced through the night and we held each other tight, and before too long I fell in love with her. Now, I'll never dance with another when I saw her standing there

I love you, I love you, I love you, that's all I want to say

You say you want a revolution. Well you know, we all want to change the world

All the lonely people, where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday

And when the brokenhearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be.

And anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

I'll give you all I got to give if you say you'll love me too. I may not have a lot to give but what I got I'll give to you. I don't care too much for money. Money can't buy me love

All you need is love, love is all you need

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Blackbird singing in the dead of night, Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life, You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life, I love you more

Obviously the best superpower.

There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

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