March Madness is officially underway. There have been upsets, buzzer beaters, Cinderella teams, and lots of emotion. These are all the things that make a great NCAA tournament. If your team is lucky to still be in the tournament, cheer loudly and proudly wear your school's apparel. If your team was unlucky in the first weekend, then start finding another team to bandwagon onto because this is one NCAA tournament you are going to want to watch until the very end. The Sweet 16 has been set, and I'm all about re-ranking the teams to their correct position.
I've re-ranked the teams into the most important ranking criteria: mascot. If you're looking for a new team to bandwagon, then look no further than this list. If your team is still in the tournament, look at how your mascot matches up to the fifteen other mascots. Gonna let you in on a little secret: there's a new number one in college basketball.
16. Indiana Hoosiers
No one actually knows what a Hoosier is, and they don't have a physical mascot to explain what it is. One is forced to imagine what such a mascot would look like. Since a Hoosier is defined as "a native or inhabitant of Indiana," I'm led to believe Hoosiers are just pale farm people, as I envision most of their state to be this way.
15. Notre Dame Fighting Irish
What is about the Indiana states with mascots that I don't understand? Maybe it's because I'm not Irish that I have a hard time identifying with this mascot, but I just don't get the Fighting Irish thing. Like, what if you're not Irish? Can you still go to this school? The one saving grace with this mascot is that they have a physical mascot to represent the Irish, unlike the other Indiana school in the Sweet 16.
14. Oklahoma Sooners
Another mascot I don't understand. It's a state culture thing. But since I'm not from this state, I'm lost. I can't really get on board with it. The physical mascot that is present at games looks like a horse. Unfortunately, I hate horses. I'm personally not a fan of such a mascot. Maybe these states should try to appeal to all people in their mascot choices.
13. Villanova Wildcats
Wildcats are so basic. It is one of the most overused mascots in college sports. For that, Villanova is ranked far down this list. Their mascot isn't even cute. Better luck next year, Villanova. I'm crying for you, just like the flute player from last season's tournament.
12. Gonzaga Bulldogs
Another mascot that is just so basic that it hurts. However, usually where there is a bulldog mascot, there is a live dog that serves as mascot for the team. Gonzaga does not have that. Really, they should be ranked last on this list just for that fact, but I guess since I'm a dog person, I'll put the Zags over Villanova.
11. Miami Hurricanes
The name hurricanes is promising. It's creative and relevant to where the school is located. But their mascot is a duck! Not only that, but it's a duck that looks like it screwed up its smoky eye. I guess I'm just lost on how we go from hurricanes to duck. Someone please let me know and maybe I'll reconsider this ranking.
10. Iowa State Cyclones
Another mascot that seems lost in translation. We go from a cyclone to a cardinal? I do like how the colors on the bird match the school colors very perfectly, but not in an obnoxious way. And, Cy the Cardinal is really promoting good teeth by flashing that beautiful smile.
9. Oregon Ducks
The Oregon Duck is super cute. One of the cutest in D1 collegiate sports if you ask me. But it's not ferocious at all. Mascots must have a fine line between cute and scary, and unfortunately, this one misses the mark. It's all cute, but nothing scary. But where Oregon lacks in scary mascots, they make up for in scary-good athletes, so props to Oregon.
8. Texas A&M Aggies
You can not deny that this dog is cute. It's not very ferocious, but it just looks so soft. And I bet it will bite someone if provoked. Everyone loves Lassie, so way to go Texas A&M for getting a fan-favorite here.
7. Syracuse Orange
Such a weird mascot choice. It's bold, but that's why it kind of works. I just really do not understand why a school in New York has an orange for its mascot. I'd understand if a school in California had this mascot. But, whatever. At the end of the day, the orange is just confusing to me, but it's kind of an institution at this point.
6. Kansas Jayhawks
A pretty meh mascot for a pretty great basketball program. However, Kansas has a mini version of the beloved mascot, and that's too cute for words.
5. Maryland Terrapins
This mascot is very creative. Testudo is also a really good name. It's strong, relates back to the animal it's representing, but non-threatening...all the great indicators of a good mascot name. So, Maryland has a solid mascot. It's not great, not bad, just pretty average (as is their basketball program).
4. Virginia Cavaliers
Cavaliers is a pretty meh choice, but their mascot is really funny to me for some reason. This mascot looks like someone I'd want to be friends with. He has major beard game, which is always commendable. This mascot knows he's hot, but every college girl can't resist the frat boy type...right? I'd definitely be caught at one or two of this mascot's house parties.
3. North Carolina Tar Heels
This mascot is such a great contender. It's cute, but fierce. It has a great outfit and name as well. Ramses has been known to do a flip from time to time, impressive for any person in a stuffed mascot outfit. UNC also has had a live version of this mascot, which is pretty awesome, albeit kind of animal abuse because they painted it Carolina blue. Regardless, Carolina has a solid mascot to go along with a solid team, and I'm impressed. Good work, Carolina.
2. Duke Blue Devils
It really pains me to have Duke this high on my ranking, but this is a really good mascot. It is fierce and very specific to the school. In a collegiate sports world full of Wildcats, Bulldogs, Wolverines, and other basic mascot choices, it's important we have creative mascots that really make their traditions known and stand the test of time. That's what Duke has done here. It's also pretty cool that their coach looks just like their mascot -- great PR on behalf of the Duke Athletic Department.
1. Wisconsin Badgers
I might be a little biased, but hear me out. Bucky really has all the markings of a great mascot. He is so cute and endearing with his sweater and smile, so he could melt any girls' heart. Yet, he is still so fierce. He is a badger after all -- those things are one of the fiercest animals in the whole kingdom. Bucky has a great outfit and name. At one point, Wisconsin had a live badger which ended up biting some fans (going back to the fierce thing). Bucky pays homage to the history of the Wisconsin state as well as the university, and there are very few other schools in the country with a badger as the mascot. Bucky is a mascot known around the country, and he is definitely a fan favorite for all. Finally, Bucky can be seen everywhere. He is not just present at sporting events, but you can find him at people's weddings and other school-related events. Bucky does it all, and he can do it all while standing on his head. So, if you ask me, the Selection Committee got it wrong and Wisconsin should be the one-seed.
