Going to the Gym; (v) what everyone should do, but very few want to.
Stage 1: You Make Plans to Go – You’re Feeling Good about Yourself
It's set, you’re going to go to the gym first thing tomorrow morning. You’re proud of yourself – you’re going to be productive. You might even reward yourself for making this good decision by eating a cookie, or two, after all you are working out tomorrow...
Stage 2: The Time Comes and You’re Not Ready….At All.
Never in your life have you heard so many excuses, and the worst part is that they’re all coming from you. “The gym is such a far walk.” “It’s cold outside.” “I think I’m getting sick so I should rest.” “It’s my neighbor’s dog’s birthday, so, clearly it’s just not a good day for me to work out.”
Stage 3: You Brave the Odds and Finally Walk to the Gym
Your friend comes to get you, so regardless of your excuses, you need to go. But, for some reason you will never understand, she thinks it would be a good idea to do a “warm up” jog on the way there and you’re barely able to keep up.
Stage 4: Workout Begins and You Feel Like a Fitness Super Star
You’re running, you’re lifting, you’re doing your thing. And, (ignoring the fact that it has only been approximately 10 minutes) you’re not even sweating and you're feeling good.
Stage 5: The CrossFit Champion of the World Starts Working Out Next to You
Your self-esteem plummets. You realize that you aren’t even working out anymore, instead you’re just watching this anomaly of a human lift more than you even knew was possible. I mean,this person’s biceps have biceps.
Stage 6: You’re Tired, Sore, and Want to Leave
After ditching the Olympian next to you and completing a few more exercises, you are exhausted. Which is good, it means you were doing something right. What’s not good though is that you’ve only been there for 20 minutes and have accomplished a mere 50% of what you had planned.
Stage 7: Excuses, Excuses….Again
You’re lying on this mat with the intention to tone your abs a bit, but lying down just feels so good – and it would feel even better to do if it was in your bed. So, you start thinking about all the reasons why you should leave the gym right now – you have to do homework, should probably shower, you have class in four hours, it’s still your neighbor’s dog’s birthday...
Stage 8: Post Workout Binge
You went to the gym today. You worked out. You made good, healthy life decisions. You should be rewarded for this. Should this reward be a big piece of pizza for lunch? Absolutely. Does that pizza have way more calories than you burned at the gym? Most Definitely. But, you worked out today…so it’s okay.
*Disclaimer: I have all the respect in the world for the so-called CrossFit Champion, I’m actually just really jealous and wish I had your motivation. Congratulations on your impeccable health and model-esque bodies. If you ever decide to come to the dark side, call me and we’ll grab some ice cream.
