Over the past few weeks, I have been really struggling with who I am, where I belong, and more importantly, the word "normal" has been an ever present point of contention. What is it? Who decides the rules for "normal"? Am I or am I not a part of this human affliction of normalcy? My obsessive nature has led me to analyze this idea to the brink of insanity.
I have desired normal for as long as I can remember; at times feeling like some sort of alien family dropped me here and left me without a guidebook for life. It is as if everyone else knows how and what to do/say, and I'm just making it up, hoping everything works out in the end. I convince myself that I am different than those around me and that all of my problems are terminally unique. But are my life struggles really as different as I make them seem? Am I really as different as I feel?
The answer I have discovered is simple; no.
"Normal" is a truly relative term that so many of us spend our life searching for and seeking out. We look for opportunities to blend in and be what the world expects of us, just so that no one will look at us sideways or think of us differently. We have been taught by our society that sticking out or being unique is a bad thing. We are made to believe that there is no room for differences in ability, appearance or or personality because God forbid someone might realize you are special. However, I am here to tell you that this sentiment is completely false. Every piece of you that moves you away from the definition of normalcy is what makes you special and the individual person you are.
It is my belief that this affliction of normalcy is sought after by all of us at some point or another. It is part of growing up and our own self-discovery. We struggle with understanding whether we should fall back into the crowd or spring forward and shine. This is where I have been at recently. Wondering whether I would be better off fitting in with those around me and being "normal", or if I should continue to grow into the person I feel drawn to be.
The conclusion I have drawn is simple.
Normal sucks.
So for me, I will continue to try and overcome the human affliction of normalcy and grow into the woman I know I have the potential to be, because if we were all the same then this world would be an incredibly boring place. You are the only you that will ever exist; please don't forget that.
"If you are always trying to be normal you will never know how amazing you can be." -Maya Angelou
