In my life I’ve faced constant disappointment. I’m not saying this to distinguish myself as unique because who hasn’t faced disappointment? A lot has been self-induced, selfishly placing expectations on peoples, things, and establishments that I shouldn’t have. I’ve learned to stop doing this after some time. On the other hand, some of the disappointments I have experienced weren't self-induced. Even with realistic expectations, it was shocking to receive said disappointment. The one I feel this evening is definitely the latter.
As of today, the presumed next president of the United States, the country I’ve been a citizen for all twenty-one years of my life, is Donald Trump. A business man, who has been endorsed by the KKK, has been accused of sexual assault by numerous women, a man who was a television star, who has openly mocked a disabled person, has disrespected women, Mexicans, and so many more. The list goes on and on. And I’m sure you can fill in the rest for me, so I’ll save it. To say I’m disappointed would be an understatement. Am I surprised though? No.
During the past couple of years, events dating back to the Trayvon Martin shooting in 2012, have been eye opening for me. Eye opening because they’re happening? No. Eye opening because they happen, get recorded, and still continue to happen. In most cases the opposition to common sense claim many things: they feared their lives, the victim had a criminal past, they had a weapon, so on and so forth. Nothing in my opinion that warranted a death. To say racism is alive would also be another understatement. It’s alive and well. It’s unsettling. As a young black male, at times I feel like I have to change my appearance so others shouldn’t be scared. Now doesn’t that sound a little wrong to you?
In all of Trump’s rally the things he’s said have been very unsettling. The slogan “Make America Great Again”? It almost brings be back to a time in world history where we really had “evil” leaders. Hitler, Stalin, Mussolini, Tojo, Mao, Pol Pot, Idi Amin, this list also goes on. The things I saw in those rallies were very reminiscent of the things I grew up reading in world history classes. But the only thing here is this isn’t a history book. This is real life. This has made it all the more surreal to me. To list Trump on that list of names is probably far-fetched as he hasn’t done anything just yet. But I fear that could happen. This election was a wakeup call that alongside the loud morally evil people in those rallies were a quiet majority all over America. A quiet majority that would make sure that the slap in the face they received with not one, but two terms of Barack Obama, would deftly be returned.
In the face of all these disappointment, there were two things that kept me “up” I guess you can say. The first thing was hope. Hope that we can persevere through adversity. Hope that things are not what they seem. Hope that things will get better tomorrow. The same hope our 44th president Barack Obama gave us. Hope is a very strong thing and it’s something I still hold through it all. These though times we face are troubling. As a country it’s something we have to face. As a race it’s a turn on a dark page in “Civil Rights”, something those same history books told me was just an “era”. It still goes on today.
And the second thing is two simple words, two words that I always think on after disappointments: What next? In the early morning after I stayed up until three in the morning to see the results of the election I headed out to start my day. The sky was gloomy and grey. People looked sadder and more tired than your usual New York City morning. Maybe I’m a writer who just looks deep into things that may not be there, but the feelings of defeat, disgust, and disdain were in the air. I looked at people shake their heads to themselves, quietness on usual loud trains. I felt the pain. Last night protests were ablaze over the country and even other parts in the world. People were ready to fight to truly make America great again. Matter fact make America good period. It was never great for us, good in itself was a reach. That’s what’s next. Growing up dwelling on the past and being stuck on my disappointment never achieved nothing. I learned to realize life goes on and you have to always focus on what is in front of you. Every single second you live in the present, as time goes on you are constantly in what is or what was your future. I intend to look on to what’s next and never ever give up on hope.
