Dear Competitive Swimming,
It has been nearly a year since we have been in contact. I miss you a lot more than I thought I would. Even with the busy year I've been having, I still think about you every single day. I am reaching out to you because you have given me so much in life, and I just wanted to say thanks.
I have played multiple sports throughout my life, and have therefore said many goodbyes to those sports; but out of all of those goodbyes, yours was definitely the hardest. We were introduced to each other during my seventh year of life. I remember our first meeting like it was yesterday. Although I previously had swim lessons, I struggled to reach the other end of the pool, gripping my tiny hands onto the lane line whenever the coaches weren’t watching. It’s hard to believe swimming twenty-five yards was once difficult for me, and how far I have come since I was an eight and under. I had the opportunity to swim year round on both the club and varsity levels. At these intense levels of competition, I was able to reach goals that I would have never imagined. Once I started to swim events such as the 200, I would sometimes wine and wish to be swimming the twenty-five again, but overall, I am tremendously proud of the progress we made together throughout the years.
Although I miss you more than anything else right now, I do not miss the hardships that you came with. By hardships, I mean physical and mental pain. I do not miss the burning pain in my shoulders every time I’d move my arms. I do not miss not being able to fall asleep at night because of the allergic reactions the chlorine would give me. I do not miss gaining time in my best event. I do not miss the toxic people that discouraged me from setting high goals. These are the things that made me question why I swam.
All of these hardships definitely caused me pain, but it is a much smaller list than of the things I do miss about you. Because of all of our hard work and dedication, my victories exceeded my defeats, and my smiles outnumbered my tears. You also helped me realize I was capable of leadership. I was able to be a leader and a role model to my teammates. I had other swimmers looking up to me and asking me for advice, which gave me the confidence that overpowers anyone or anything that has ever put me down. These are all of the things that gave me passion, and I am forever grateful.
Out of all of the wonderful things you have blessed me with, I think I am most thankful for all of the people that came along for the ride. Because of you, I have built beautiful friendships, some of which have become my family. Whenever I felt discouraged, these people were always there to tell me everything was going to be okay. Coaches are most certainly included in this category. They contributed much more to my life as a swimmer than stroke instruction and hard practices. My coaches were and still are my role models that helped shaped me into the person I am today. With my swim coaches and teammates, I have made so many memories that will last a lifetime.
With everything we went through, it is no surprise how our twelve years together flew by as fast as they did. Just like I remember the first time I swam, I remember the last time as well. It didn’t really click that it would be the last time I’d ever race. I didn’t truly realize my swimming career had come to a close until I saw my old high school teammates posting pictures of their season that I wasn’t apart of. This is when it really hit me that I was no longer a competitive swimmer.
Mourning over you not being in my life made me realize something; we may not be physically together anymore, but you will always be apart of my life. I may have left you, but you will never leave me. Saying we have been through a lot together is an understatement. Swimming, you will always have a special place in my heart. I may never swim another race again, but I will always be a competitive swimmer. So thank you, swimming, for making this journey nothing less than extraordinary.
Love,
A girl you made stronger
