I used to be extraordinarily neat. When I say used to, I'm going back to my preschool days. I really took the lessons from my teachers to heart: "Always clean up after yourself." After a day of fun, I would put my Barbies back in their proper place. All the house accessories had to go into their own separate box; and Loonette the Clown, from the show the Big Comfy Couch, was my role model with her "10 Second Tidy."

I still like being organized. I'm still a fan of to-do lists and keeping a color-coded calendar. I still enjoy helping a friend out by sorting through their fridge to maximize space to fit tonight's leftovers. Also, as strange as this may sound, I enjoy washing the dishes - even when I wasn't the one who put them in the sink. I find it oddly therapeutic - crazy, right?

However, while I still like helping keep other people neat and organized, it seems over the years I neglected my own neat habits. I don't gawk if I have clothes on the floor or if I forgot to put my late night cereal bowl in the sink or if I didn't make my bed. All things my former neat-self would certainly not do.

Even today, on the phone, my dad joked with me about my former neat ways by asking me, "What happened?". I quickly retorted, "I probably learned how to not be neat from you."

Our conversation got me thinking. What did happen? My neat tendencies still exist; however, they are concentrated in different ways. Why the change?

Maybe it's because after living through the best years of my life in preschool, the real world of kindergarten, middle school, high school, and now college carried with it a lot more complexities. There were things to do that ranked higher than making sure my floor was spotless. I got carried away with life.

Or maybe my neatness or lack thereof is a reflection of my own mental state. An organized mess.

Or maybe it's a combination of both, added with a dash of the fact that I like to help others organize to feel like I'm making a difference and for a few seconds forgetting about my own problems.

Or maybe still I learned from observing my parents and the world around me that some messes are okay. Sometimes learning how to make a mess is a part of growing up.

That doesn't mean it's easy though. As I get older it seems I get into more messes, from faltering friendships to lousy landlords to the frustration that is my future. I get by reminding myself these messes are temporary and I will clean them up (especially with help from my family and friends). Each mess comes with a new chance to clean it up and start new. While I'm not as neat as I used to be, I still got it in me to keep doing a "10 Second Tidy" until I eventually clean it up.