People are so used to having New Years Resolutions that may or may not follow through.

What about doing some life cleaning before the new year even comes?

Last week, someone in their late twenties got a message on Facebook from a high school classmate still mad at her from something she did in the 11th grade. When someone you care about hurts you, it sucks—like, a lot. You can hold on to anger and resent them... or you can embrace forgiveness and move forward with your life.

The grudge doesn't help anything.

Who hasn't been hurt by the actions or words of a friend? A grudge is taking that hurt and harboring it so much to where it lasts. They're like a hefty trash bag of toxic energy that lingers a smell in the house that keeps us stuck in anger. They don't make us feel better or heal our hurt rather we become pridefully bitter, while still longing for the comfort we've desired since the original wounding.

It's a constant reminder to others and ourselves of what we went through, why we're so mad, and why we are who we are... but it's not who we are.

Grudges disconnect us from our own heart.

Even if it's below the surface, grudges work their way into our thinking and make us shut people out. It becomes easier to start seeing everyone as someone who could screw you over. These wounds can leave you with lasting feelings of anger and bitterness and you get all worked up just from talking about what happened.

Getting someone to change his or her actions isn't the point of forgiveness.

We never forgive for the sake of others but to help save ourselves. Think of forgiveness as how it can change your life — being released into emotional and spiritual freedom. I'm 23 years old now and I finally forgave someone who has hurt me for years. We used to be friends, had a falling out that was pulled out from the closet a year later that resulted in a round two that went way worse. A year after the final word, I reached out with a text that laid out everything I've learned and felt in the last 365 days then a sense of peace of closure came over me.

Are we now friends again? Not even close! That's not what I wanted; I was tired of being mad and wanted to move on. Now that huge bag of toxic energy is finally thrown away where I don't have it lingering around anymore and now I have a motivation to do that with even more people because I want to be freed. We never forgive for the sake of others but to help save ourselves. By embracing forgiveness, you embrace peace, hope, gratitude and joy.

It's about to be a new year, and a new decade. Do you really want to carry harbored feelings into it?