I was born and raised in Missouri, and I am proud.
Imagine this scenario: you meet someone new while you are on vacation, camp, college, etc. and they ask you what state you are from. Seems harmless, right? Wrong. As soon as the word “Missouri” leaves my lips, this look of pity runs across their face.
Missouri is not just filled to the brim with corn, people. Yes, we have 97,100 operating farms in the state, but that just means we know how to provide for ourselves, family, and other states. There is no denying, Missouri is a huge agricultural state. However, that does not make us boring.
Next time someone looks at you critically for living in Missouri, let them know what they are missing out on (or use this list as your personal Missouri bucket list).
1. Forest Park (St. Louis)
This park is like a combo meal at McDonald's, but better. This park was built on the grounds of the first 1904 World Fair located in St. Louis, Missouri. The same attraction that was highlighted in the fair, "Jewel Box," still stands today. The park also includes the St. Louis Zoo (which is free by the way), the Saint Louis Art Museum (also free), the Saint Louis History Museum (yeah, still free), and The Muny, which America's oldest and largest outdoor theatre. Also, every year Loufest is held at Forest park, which is an annual music festival in September.
2. Cementland (St. Louis)
Essentially, Cementland was meant to be a grown up playground for the adventurous adult. The same man, Bob Cassilly, who built the City Museum, attempted to build this spectacle, but before he could finish he died in an accident while trying to work on the project alone. The eerie, unfinished Cementland remains abandoned since 2011, but that does not stop people from trespassing to experience its wonders.
3. City Museum (St. Louis)
As mentioned before, the City Museum was created by Bob Cassilly, and is a popular spot all year round. The old shoe factory turned Museum is basically a big playground in the middle of the city for both children and adults. It includes a ferris wheel on the roof, a bus hanging off the building, and a huge indoor slide.
4. Go to literally any county fair (found in any county)
Alright, yes, this has to do with the agricultural, farming part of Missouri, but that does not make it boring. Where else would you eat fried Oreos and funnel cakes, ride questionable/mobile amusement park rides, pet a baby calf, and possibly even watch a monster truck show?
5. Six Flags (Eureka)
Just about every person and their grandma has visited Six Flags at least once if they live in Missouri. It originally opened in 1971 as the third Six Flags establishment in America. However, do not worry, the only ride that still stands from the opening date is The Mine Train.
6. Bonne Terre Mines (Bonne Terre)
A mid-American treasure-- the Bonne Terre Mines. A 1800's era manmade mine that harvested lead ore, but closed in 1962. The mine is always 65 degrees and if you visit you can take a boat tour in the 17 mile long lake, or scuba dive in the crystal clear water.
7. Devil’s Icebox (Columbia)
Though currently closed due to bats being infected with white-nose syndrome, this double-sinkhole is located in Colombia, MO. This cave is unique because of its cool temperature and the animals who have adapted to the sinkhole environment. Professionals have even mapped the cave to as far as seven miles.
8. Glore Psychiatric Museum (St. Joseph)
If you have $5 in your wallet, and you are passing through St. Joseph-- you are in for a treat. The St. Joseph’s State Lunatic Asylum No. 2 was established in1874 (later named after a doctor named Glore who invented several "treatment devices" for mental illnesses). The museum is filled with stories of mentally ill patients and shows off some of the devices used to "help" them. Did I mention one of the patients swallowed 453 nails?
9. The Off-Sets (Frederick)
The Off-Sets offer a plethora of activities: Swimming, floating, zip-lining, cave exploring, cliff jumping, and camping. It is an old quarry with a whole lot of adventure, what's not to love?
10. Laumeier Sculpture Park (St. Louis)
Number one, this picture is adorable. Number two, Sculpture Park is one of the most creative places in St. Louis, and that's saying something. The whole park is literally an artist's playground. Sculpture of an eyeball? Check. Odd tubular, red, metal structure? Check. Random cement cutout of a face in the ground? Check.
11. Lake of the Ozarks (Lake of the Ozarks)
Honestly, I think the best way to describe this is Missouri's mini version of the Great Lakes, but also not really that at all. However, Lake of the Ozarks is a great vacation spot for the summers, a place to have summer camp (I know I went to more than a few here), and to basically relax.
12. Elephant Rocks (Belleview)
If you love elephants and hiking, you will love Elephant Rocks State Park. The park is assumed to be formed by 1.5 billion year old granite, which over time has been worn down to look like giant elephants standing in a circus line.
13. Talking Rocks Cavern (Stone County)
The cavern is so breathtaking that one of Truman Powell's son (who was one of the original finders) gave it the name "Talking Rocks" because the formation spoke for themselves. Now, the cavern functions as a tourist attraction: you can picnic, mine for gemstones, and even play a round of mini golf.
14. Johnson’s Shut-Ins (Middle Brook)
This state park is a beautiful gem. You can hike, ride a horse on a trail, swim, picnic, and camp. You could literally spend your entire day climbing around on rocks channeling your inner child.
15. Lemp Mansion (St. Louis)
Long story short, a brewery owner named William Lemp Sr. lived in the Lemp Mansion with his family until he committed suicide in his office. Then his son, William Lemp Jr. later committed suicide. Lastly, Charles Lemp, also killed himself, and his dog in a double suicide. He left a note saying "St. Louis Mo/May 9, 1949, In case I am found dead blame it on no one but me. Ch. A. Lemp." Spooky.
16. Times Beach
In 1985, 2,000 residents of Times Beach were forced to evacuate (except for an old couple that refused to leave) the area due to a company using poisonous spray oil to clean dust in the horse stables, which resulted in the spreading of poisonous chemicals and the death of 62 horses.
17. The Moon (Weldon Spring)
Essentially, this is just a radioactive waste site from the 1940's that produced seven million pounds of TNT for World War II, but now they covered it with a bunch of rocks and students take field trips there.
18. World’s largest shuttlecocks (Kansas City)
The title pretty much explains itself.
19. Kansas City Workhouse (Kansas City)
This is an abandoned castle built in 1897 by jail inmates as punishment, but now is covered in graffiti and a popular spot to wander and explore.
20. Taum Sauk Mountain (Middle Brook)
Taum Sauk mountain is the highest point in Missouri and has multiple hiking trails and camping sites. Basically, this is Missouri's best hiking spot.
Overall, Missouri is interesting, odd, adventurous, haunted, a little toxic, and, most importantly, more than just farmland.
