At my university, we say, "Follow your passion, find your place." In college, we expect that's going to happen automatically; that we're immediately going to fall into our places and instantly adjust to our new lives.
It wasn't like that for me. In fact, I usually try to block most of freshman year from my memory. I don't talk about my first few months of college because back then, I thought I was some kind of outcast. I hadn't made any new friends, I hated all of my Gen Ed classes and all I ever wanted to do on the weekends was go home. Everyone around me had found their place while I still felt like I was treading foreign territory.
Sophomore year was the perfect time for change be different. The previous year let me learn how to be a college student, how to cope with homesickness, anxiety and panic attacks. In the backseat of my parents' car on that fateful day in August, a new year was approaching. Since I already had the college thing down, I swore that this year was going to be different, even if I didn't know how.
I don't talk about my freshman year because I was a different person then. I went from the shy, isolated student to a leader. I rushed a gender-inclusive fraternity and got more involved with the campus newspaper. Before I knew it, I had two families and my home away from home became my true home. It took a year, but I finally found my place.
Sophomore year not only gave me a second chance at college, but a second chance at becoming the person I always wanted to be. Over the course of this past year, I have taken two executive council positions in my fraternity, become the news editor for my campus newspaper and gotten to see my first short story publication. I still have a long way to come and a lot of doubt, anxiety and stress to overcome, but if the scared girl from freshman year saw me now, she wouldn't believe her eyes. The girl who had hit rock bottom would hardly believe the passion that had yet to come out.
This time last year, I wouldn't have dared call myself happy. This year hasn't been without its struggles and its bad times, but sophomore year gave me the brand new perspective that was necessary for change.
Not everyone is going to find their place immediately, but once you do, it will slap you in the face and take you by surprise. You'll hardly believe the difference a year makes.
