As a normal human being, I am constantly self-conscious. Also, as a person who has high anxiety, my mind is constantly going a million miles a minute. So, let me explain one social situation and what my anxious brain says during it. I'll set the scene for you; You're out to dinner with a group of friends on trivia night.

Before you've even left the house: "Man I look awful in my clothes, maybe I should change into something else." Multiply that by 4. "My hair looks so frizzy and bleh, maybe I should put it up and just leave it alone... or should I dress up so that I don't look like a bum in front of my friends?" "I wonder if I have enough money to go out to eat?" "I wonder if I have enough gas to get there." "What if my friends say something about my makeup or lack of it?" "Do I get there early and look weird or should I come fashionably late?" "I hate being late so I guess I'll go early."

In the car on the way to dinner: "I wonder if people in other cars are looking at me and judging me." "I have fat rolls when I sit." "I'm definitely way to early, no one is here. I look so stupid." " Do I text my friends and ask them if they are here or do I wait until I see them?" "Is looking out for them creepy?" "God, I am a weird soul." "Thank goodness, someone texted me. I am saved."

In the restaurant: "Who do I sit next to?" "The menu is huge and overwhelming." "Do I branch out and risk hurting my stomach or do I stick to what I know?" "Are my friends judging me for what I'm wearing?" "Are my friends judging what I order for dinner?" "Gosh everything is expensive, do I look stupid if I order something small?" "Should I order a drink too, everyone else is?" "Fuck it I want the cheese fries." "What if so and so brings up things that make me uncomfortable? Do I say my opinion in hopes others will agree or hold my tongue to prevent tension?" "Things are kind of awkward, what do I say?" "My food is finally here, I want to scarf it all down but will I look fat?" "Oh god the waiter is judging me for sure."

Trivia starts: "Oh I think I know the answer to the question, do I tell them or just let them try to come up with it on their own." "I'm not 100% sure I know the answer but I'm pretty sure, do I say something?" "They asked me if I knew the answer to something and I definitely didn't. Do I look stupid know?" "Do my friends think I'm dumb?" "Man, I hardly formed a sentence, I'm a sad excuse for a human." "Keep your mouth shut, it's easier this way."

Checks arrive: "Everyone is paying with cash so why don't you have cash?" And the latter, "everyone is paying with a card why aren't you?" "Why did you order that amount of food?" "Should I take home my left overs, or everyone else has left overs you are fat." "I usually tip more than my friends does that make me weird?"

I'm sure there's much more that goes through my mind but that's just a little taste. I can tell you though, that I try my hardest every day to be positive and to have a positive outlook on myself.

Most of this information may not affect you personally, I can guarantee there is someone in your life that has a similar brain. For some reason our brains need the recognition that things are alright every once in a while. So, if you have a friend who's like me let them know that things are going to be okay or that they look nice. You'll soon see a gleaming smile you didn't know they had.