Potentially one of the most terrifying things in life is admitting to someone that you like them. The fear of denial and the overall vulnerability of the situation can leave you shaking. We, as a generation, have found a way around this that unfortunately not only inhibits our communication skills, but also our emotional connections.
Let’s take a moment to reminisce on elementary school. You’re running around, twirling in the sun with your friends, shrieking out of sheer delight to be on recess. You’re confused to see Jimmy approaching you and your friends. Then Jimmy does something that makes all your friends squeal! He hands you a chocolate milk and says he likes you! Ahhh, your heart goes aflutter! One thing leads to another and a week later your best friend Sally is administering your wedding vows under the jungle bars while your other friends throw flowers they hand picked from the soccer field in the air. He pecks you on the cheek and the deed is done. You’re a married gal!
Nowadays, the simplicity of relationships is nonexistent. Your heart does not flutter because John came up and professed his love for you. Instead, your heart skips a beat when Tommy swipes right on you on Tinder. You feel a jolt of happiness when Cameron likes your Instagram picture. You jump around in excitement when Gerald finally slides into your DM’s. You scream when Frances asks you on a date over Facebook message and then again when he sends you a goodnight text after it.
What changed from elementary school to now? Why do we consider a double tap on Instagram a compliment? Why do we think being asked out over text is okay? Technology has become a crutch. Not only has it lowered our standards for social interactions, but it has also completely changed emotional interactions.
Let’s say you and Frances hit it off and are now exclusively dating, but he’s been acting a little off lately. How do you gauge his feelings? Instead of asking him, you check to see if he’s been liking your Facebook statuses or tweets. Okay, you’re in the clear, but wait! Ohhh nooo! He hasn’t been commenting on your Instagram pictures recently! He doesn’t retweet you as often as he used to! Now you’re freaking out and rereading all your old text messages to see if there were any signs of disinterest. This makes you more anxious when you realize his words to emoji ratio has gone down significantly. You start to act strange around him. Frances is unaware of the cyber research you’ve done on the relationship and becomes confused about your behavior. Slowly but surely, you self-destruct the relationship all because you took more account in his social media attention over real-life affection.
Moral of the story? Social media is not a platform to display your affection. WCW and MCM mean nothing more than a picture. Having him consistently like your Instagram pictures doesn’t mean you’ll stay together forever. Everything you can possibly text, direct message or gif will mean so much more face-to-face. I know it’s hard, but just remember if lil’ seven year old Jimmy can do it, so can you!