The Scars That Create Us

The Scars That Create Us

"Scars show us where we've been, not where we are going."

What is a scar? Is it a physical or mental scar? Everyone has them, even though we can't always see them.

Visual scars are scars that people can see. These scars people can be proud of, or something that saved their lives. These scars help define people and create them into becoming who they truly are. I hold a scar on my right ring finger from a homemade slip-n-slide incident that lead to surgery. This scar taught me to be more careful when it comes to slip-n-slides, so I usually just avoid them. We can see everyone’s visual scars but we might not be able to tell what they are from, or what they have taught that person. These visual scars can become a way for people to teach each other things about life, and share why they are who they are. Scars become part of our personality by what they taught and who it shaped up into.

People often act certain ways because of events that happened in their lives. These visual scars can often help us understand why someone acts the way they do. Scars help people connect as well. If someone has a scar on their knee from knee replacement surgery you can often relate to that person by connecting through your scars. These scars also show that no matter what you look like we are all still human and share the same things. We learn to accept everyone for who they are.

Mental scars are slightly a bit more complicated. These are the scars we can not see, and sometimes don’t share with others. Every person has some mental scars that mold that person into who they are. Mental scars can be created in a lot of different ways. Sometimes mental scars are created from a bad situation. If someone gets cheated on, they begin to build a wall to protect their hearts. This becomes a mental scar that this person carries with them. They may begin to cut off potential relationships to avoid the same situation, or their brain might try to get them out of a relationship because they don't want to deepen the scar. This is a barrier that a mental scar has created. Sometimes when someone holds this scar others get irritated at this person. It's hard to understand why someone holds a specific mental scar, and it's even harder to see the mental scars. When someone isn't acting the way you would expect them to, talk to them. They might hold a mental scar that you know nothing about. Sometimes you just need to dig a little deeper into someone. The surface doesn't tell the whole story.

Some mental scars are good ones. Some children associate a certain markets with getting a candy at checkout. This mental scar is a good one, and is the reason children ask for a sucker at the checkout line. Some mental scars are the reason people get overly excited about a topic or a place. These are also mental scars that can create conversations, and learn more about a person. These mental scars aren't seen either but add to the person’s personality.

We need to be considerate of others mental scars, but we also need to think about our own. If we hold a mental scar we can’t let it hold us back forever. If we went through a rough relationship we can't hold the walls up forever. We need to let this scar heal, it can heal slowly… but let it heal. If someone comes in your life, help them! Explain this scar to them, let them understand you and why you are who you are! Communication is key! Scars create us into who we are, but we can’t let them define us! Let all your scars heal over time!!

We can create mental scars for each other, it's a part of life. It's not a good part of life, but it's a fact of life. They say actions speak louder than words and that couldn't be more true. When we do something to someone, even something small, it could impact their life forever. Next time you think about talking about someone behind their back, or doing something “funny” to someone, think about how you would react. Would this give you a scar? We don’t want to “get equal” with someone, that gets you nowhere. “Getting even” just hurts someone else. Think before you act to make sure you don’t give someone else a mental scar. If you do, please be sensitive! Say you're sorry!! Your “image” doesn't matter in the end.

In the end we are all full of mystery! Our lives and scars shape us into who we are. We need to know that everyone leads different lives, everyone experiences different scars that help mold them into the person they are today. Scars are a beautiful thing! Without one of the scars in our life we would not be the person we are today! Be grateful for the scars you hold! Share your scars with others, you might connect with someone you never thought you would connect with!

"Never be ashamed of a scar, it means you were stronger that what tried to hurt you."

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17 Empowering Bible Verses For Women

You go, girl.

We all have those days where we let the negative thoughts that we're "not good enough," "not pretty enough" or "not smart enough" invade our minds. It's easy to lose hope in these situations and to feel like it would be easier to just give up. However, the Bible reminds us that these things that we tell ourselves are not true and it gives us the affirmations that we need. Let these verses give you the power and motivation that you're lacking.

1. Proverbs 31:25

"She is clothed with strength and dignity and she laughs without fear of the future."

2. Psalm 46:5

"God is within her, she will not fall."

3. Luke 1:45

"Blessed is she who believed that the Lord would fulfill His promises to her."

4. Proverbs 31:17

"She is energetic and strong, a hard worker."

5. Psalm 28:7

"The Lord is my strength and my shield."

6. Proverbs 11:16

"A gracious woman gains respect, but ruthless men gain only wealth."

7. Joshua 1:9

"Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."

8. Proverbs 31:30

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised."

9. 1 Corinthians 15:10

"By the grace of God, I am what I am."

10. Proverbs 31:26

"When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness."

11. Psalm 139:14

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made."

12. 1 Peter 3:3-4

"Don't be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God."

13. Colossians 2:10

"And in Christ you have been brought to fullness."

14. 2 Timothy 1:7

"For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline."

15. Jeremiah 29:11

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' says the Lord. 'They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.'"

16. Exodus 14:14

"The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm."

17. Song of Songs 4:7

"You are altogether beautiful, my darling, beautiful in every way."

Next time you're feeling discouraged or weak, come back to these verses and use them to give you the strength and power that you need to conquer your battles.

Cover Image Credit: Julia Waterbury

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Poetry On Odyssey: Some Days

A poem that reminds you that you're not alone.


Some days,

You dread the sound of your alarm. You snooze and snooze and snooze and snooze.

When you finally pull yourself out of bed, pressed time forces you to throw on stained sweats

you find yourself chugging a cup of coffee.

You sit on the couch and contemplate calling out of work

You caught the stomach bug,

Or perhaps the flu,

Maybe you broke your collar bone

Or need a new phone

The endless list of excuses repeats through your head as you sit on the couch, wishing you were still in bed.

It takes every ounce

Every breath

Every fiber of your being to pull yourself off the couch

And into the car

And into the building where you work

Some days,

This is just how it goes

You are not alone.

Some days,

You awake to the beautiful sound of birds

Chirping outside your window

The sun sneaks its way into your room

A smile creeps across your face as you realize you are awake to see a new day

You make a good breakfast

You read a few pages of your favorite book

You get your mind ready for the things it will accomplish today

Before you know it you've worked an entire day

Your job is done

As you pull into your driveway,

you take a few breaths

Feeling grateful for another meaningful day.

Some days,

This is how it goes

You are not alone.

Every day is a gamble,

Every day is a gift

The key to getting more good days

Is believing that everyday is one.

You are not alone, this is just how it goes.

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