What is a scar? Is it a physical or mental scar? Everyone has them, even though we can't always see them.

Visual scars are scars that people can see. These scars people can be proud of, or something that saved their lives. These scars help define people and create them into becoming who they truly are. I hold a scar on my right ring finger from a homemade slip-n-slide incident that lead to surgery. This scar taught me to be more careful when it comes to slip-n-slides, so I usually just avoid them. We can see everyone’s visual scars but we might not be able to tell what they are from, or what they have taught that person. These visual scars can become a way for people to teach each other things about life, and share why they are who they are. Scars become part of our personality by what they taught and who it shaped up into.

People often act certain ways because of events that happened in their lives. These visual scars can often help us understand why someone acts the way they do. Scars help people connect as well. If someone has a scar on their knee from knee replacement surgery you can often relate to that person by connecting through your scars. These scars also show that no matter what you look like we are all still human and share the same things. We learn to accept everyone for who they are.

Mental scars are slightly a bit more complicated. These are the scars we can not see, and sometimes don’t share with others. Every person has some mental scars that mold that person into who they are. Mental scars can be created in a lot of different ways. Sometimes mental scars are created from a bad situation. If someone gets cheated on, they begin to build a wall to protect their hearts. This becomes a mental scar that this person carries with them. They may begin to cut off potential relationships to avoid the same situation, or their brain might try to get them out of a relationship because they don't want to deepen the scar. This is a barrier that a mental scar has created. Sometimes when someone holds this scar others get irritated at this person. It's hard to understand why someone holds a specific mental scar, and it's even harder to see the mental scars. When someone isn't acting the way you would expect them to, talk to them. They might hold a mental scar that you know nothing about. Sometimes you just need to dig a little deeper into someone. The surface doesn't tell the whole story.

Some mental scars are good ones. Some children associate a certain markets with getting a candy at checkout. This mental scar is a good one, and is the reason children ask for a sucker at the checkout line. Some mental scars are the reason people get overly excited about a topic or a place. These are also mental scars that can create conversations, and learn more about a person. These mental scars aren't seen either but add to the person’s personality.

We need to be considerate of others mental scars, but we also need to think about our own. If we hold a mental scar we can’t let it hold us back forever. If we went through a rough relationship we can't hold the walls up forever. We need to let this scar heal, it can heal slowly… but let it heal. If someone comes in your life, help them! Explain this scar to them, let them understand you and why you are who you are! Communication is key! Scars create us into who we are, but we can’t let them define us! Let all your scars heal over time!!

We can create mental scars for each other, it's a part of life. It's not a good part of life, but it's a fact of life. They say actions speak louder than words and that couldn't be more true. When we do something to someone, even something small, it could impact their life forever. Next time you think about talking about someone behind their back, or doing something “funny” to someone, think about how you would react. Would this give you a scar? We don’t want to “get equal” with someone, that gets you nowhere. “Getting even” just hurts someone else. Think before you act to make sure you don’t give someone else a mental scar. If you do, please be sensitive! Say you're sorry!! Your “image” doesn't matter in the end.

In the end we are all full of mystery! Our lives and scars shape us into who we are. We need to know that everyone leads different lives, everyone experiences different scars that help mold them into the person they are today. Scars are a beautiful thing! Without one of the scars in our life we would not be the person we are today! Be grateful for the scars you hold! Share your scars with others, you might connect with someone you never thought you would connect with!

"Never be ashamed of a scar, it means you were stronger that what tried to hurt you."