10 Real Questions From College Guys About Love And Dating

10 Real Questions From College Guys About Love And Dating

A once in a life time opportunity, to find out the questions college guys have about love and dating.
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“Your biggest problem is that you love being in love.” This is what my mom recently said to me while we were talking about my recent break-up.

After a failed attempt of trying to defend myself through five minutes of stuttering, I walked out of her office frustrated and silent. Then like clockwork, while texting one of my sorority sisters, she pointed out that I don’t need to have a love life, but rather flings.

So here I am laying in my bed, listening to "Only You" by Yaz (yes, the song is older than I am) thinking about love and dating. Is it really such a problem to be in love with love? Do I really need to just have flings? Then, I started wondering how guys felt.

I am like a deer in the headlights when it comes to figuring out how guys think and operate. After all, I have only really ever seriously dated two guys. Intrigued, and starting out as a joke, I sent out a Google Doc to all the fraternities my sorority has on GroupMe, asking guys to anonymously submit questions about love and dating in college. And guess what? They actually sent in questions!

Here it is ladies, the questions that the handsome college men of Purdue have about love and dating in college and my thoughts on them.

1. "If I like two girls and they both like me back, what do I do?"

I wish I could tell you who would be best for you, but ultimately, only you can decide that. If anything, I would tell you to be honest with them because if they find out about each other, they could possibly feel betrayed!

2. "How do you deal with having hardly any dating experience, especially in an environment where most people want to hook up?"

Just do you! It is 100 percent OK to not be looking for a hookup! I know I’m not. If anything, just live your life with your standards and goals in mind. It is easier said than done, but eventually, you will find the right person that is not going just want to hook up. They are out there, so don’t give up hope!

3. "Where are the non-crazy chicks at?"

Well, I don’t know where you keep meeting these crazy chicks but I am pretty sure Purdue University does not only accept “crazy chicks”. If you keep meeting these girls in certain environments (parties, Tinder, etc.), you should probably expand and meet girls in a new type of environment.

4. "How well does a girl need to know you before you ask her out?"

I mean, I would not just randomly go on a date with a random guy that came up to me on the street, but you could always go up to her and have a genuine conversation to get her number! No method of communication is better than in person! So go get ‘em!

5. "What if one person in a relationship has no sexual experience?"

Like I said above, THAT IS TOTALLY FINE! Particularly in college relationships, people make it seem that if you aren’t having sex, it’s not working out. Well, they are lying. I am willing to bet that a lot more relationships than what one thinks, are not having sex.

6. "Can you fall in love more than once?"

YES! YES! YES! Of course you can. Do you remember that feeling you had when you had your first kiss or first actual relationship? That was love! I also believe that there are many different types of love because the love you felt for your first girlfriend is way different than the love you will feel for your future spouse! It doesn’t invalidate that love, it’s just a different type of love.

7. "Do girls prefer to be asked out by the guy first?"

Yes. While girls often like to take control of situations, it is always nice to be approached by a guy first. It shows that you are genuinely interested in them and in the relationship, especially if you do it in person. (Do it in person!)

8. "Have friends with benefits ever worked in the history of mankind."

One word, two letters, very simple word- no.

9. "A lot of sorority girls have a lot of guy friends so how do I know if she’s being playful with me like with her other guy friends or if she’s actually flirting?"

I think if she had further feelings for you, she would treat you different or would tell you herself. Unfortunately, it sounds like you have fallen into the never ending void of the friend zone.

10. "Can you ever love someone new without closure of a past relationship?"

Yes, I definitely think you can. It really sucks and I would know because this has happened to me but you will live and love again another day. It may take time, but I definitely think it’s possible. There is no such thing as the perfect thing at the wrong time because the perfect thing would be perfect at any time.

While I received and overwhelming about of questions these were just my favorites! Actually, I had a lot of very similar questions. To answer the many questions referring to sex that I didn’t post, all in one statement, I am not a personal sex therapist nor do I want to be. Guys, either step up your game or stop making relationships and love all about sex because it is not all about that.

A shocking question that I received specifically for me was “Do you plan to be in a serious relationship by the end of college?”. At first, I kind of laughed, but when I truly think about it I don’t quite have an answer. I think ideally, in some perfect world, yes, I would love to be in a serious, committed relationship by the end of my time at Purdue (LOL chances of that happening though are looking slim).

I mean isn’t that one of the biggest stereotypes of college anyway? That we meet the person we will marry in college? But realistically, I would be okay if I wasn’t. Sometimes life happens, and if the love of my life isn’t at Purdue then he is somewhere out there!

There you have it, ladies, maybe guys don’t think all that much different from us. While it may seem impossible or that you aren’t finding the right person in college, I really just think it takes time. For both guys and girls, while waiting for that special someone, focus on yourself and your friends because that is who will always be there despite whether you are in a relationship or not.

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Why Girls Love The Dad Bod

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In case you haven't noticed lately, girls are all about that dad bod. Girls have been dealing with body image issues since the beginning of time until recent (for those of you who consider yourselves to be "Thick thin") I hadn't heard about this body type until my roommate mentioned it. She used to be crazy over guys she claimed had the dad bod. After observing the guys she found attractive, I came to understand this body type well and was able to identify it. The dad bod is a nice balance between a beer gut and working out. The dad bod says, "I go to the gym occasionally, but I also drink heavily on the weekends and enjoy eating eight slices of pizza at a time." It's not an overweight guy, but it isn't one with washboard abs, either.

The dad bod is a new trend and fraternity boys everywhere seem to be rejoicing. Turns out skipping the gym for a few brews last Thursday after class turned out to be in their favor. While we all love a sculpted guy, there is just something about the dad bod that makes boys seem more human, natural, and attractive. Here are a few reasons that girls are crazy about the dad bod.

It doesn't intimidate us.
Few things are worse than taking a picture in a bathing suit, one being taking a picture in a bathing suit with a guy who is crazy fit. We don't want a guy that makes us feel insecure about our body. We are insecure enough as it is. We don't need a perfectly sculpted guy standing next to us to make us feel worse.

SEE ALSO: Slim Thick Is The New Thin

We like being the pretty one.

We love people saying "they look cute together." But we still like being the center of attention. We want to look skinny and the bigger the guy, the smaller we feel and the better we look next to you in a picture.

Better cuddling.
No one wants to cuddle with a rock. Or Edward Cullen. The end.

Good eats.
The dad bod says he doesn't meal prep every Sunday night so if you want to go to Taco Tuesday or $4 pitcher Wednesday, he'd be totally down. He's not scared of a cheat meal because he eats just about anything and everything.

You know what you're getting.
Girls tend to picture their future together with their guys early on. Therefore, if he already has the dad bod going on, we can get used to it before we date him, marry him, have three kids. We know what we are getting into when he's got the same exact body type at the age of 22 that he's going to have at 45.


So there you go. A simple break down of why girls everywhere are going nuts over this body type on males. We like it. We love it. We want some more of it. So here's to you dad bods, keep it up. Men, confidently strut that gut on the beach because while you stare at us in our bikinis we will be staring just as hard.

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If you Don't make Communication a priority, your long-distance relationship is over

This isn't the age of carrier pigeons, the Pony Express and smoke signals and it's time your significant other showed it.

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If you have ever been in a long-distance relationship you know how important it is to spend quality time with your significant other. Unfortunately, due to the fact that your relationship is long-distance, this in-person quality time with each other is so rare. This makes the few times you do get to see each other incredibly special and meaningful as you can make the absolute most of every moment you get to spend with each other.

Nevertheless, no relationship can survive long-distance if you only rely on those few times a year that you get to see each other. Communication is so incredibly important to strengthen and build your relationship and this is something that needs to happen every day, not just once a month, or whenever you are lucky enough to get to actually be with each other.

In today's world, it is relatively easy to find ways to communicate over long-distance. Social media and technology are literally with us everywhere we go, making it so incredibly simple to keep in contact with our friends and significant others no matter the distance.

Honestly, this should go without saying, but you should WANT to talk to your significant other. It should make you happy to send them a good morning or good night text, to SnapChat them something from your day or to call them on your lunch break. And conversely, it should make you sad to consider the distance and how little you get to see each other, causing you to WANT to find other ways to make it through the time apart. Just because you can't be physically in each other's presence does not mean that you cannot still find ways to "be" together.

And if you don't feel sad when you don't communicate on a regular basis, quite honestly, you should really consider whether or not this is the right person for you to be in a relationship with. Are you okay not talking to some of your best friends for long periods of time? What if the person was living in the same place as you? Would it still be acceptable for you to not hear from them or see them for the same period of time?

Inevitably, if you don't hear from your boyfriend or girlfriend for several says at a time, you end up missing out on so much of their life. Without check up texts and calls, what kind of relationship are you really in? Communication shows that you are invested. Communication shows the person that they are loved and that their happiness matters to you. It's that emotional connection and investment that truly builds trust.

So stop making excuses for when you don't hear from your long-distance boyfriend or girlfriend for several days at a time. Yes, you're long-distance, so you have a lot of challenges to overcome to sustain your relationship, but communication is not something that should be lacking. It takes five seconds to send a text message. Scheduling a skype date is the same as scheduling an in-person date, except you don't have to leave your living room. Making communication a priority might seem obvious, but it's also a daily choice that ultimately shows that your significant other is a priority to you.

Cover Image Credit:

Jon Ly

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