There are many things in this world that I'd much rather be doing than certain things in this life. Like, I'd rather be writing in my novel than having to deal with certain people that I don't care for, or I'd rather be working out than having to unravel some friend's trivial love squabble with their significant other. Some may call me lazy for feeling this way, others might even call me a jerk, but frankly, even if this is the case, I couldn't care less. Opinions matter to me almost as little as the daily lives of our presidential nominees do. I'm human, alright? And I'm pretty sure you've all been in my shoes at least once or twice in your lives, so there's no need to disagree. Besides, I get the feeling we'll all be on the same page with what I'll be talking about this week. This week is all about make-up assignments.
Remember my last article, and how I mentioned that there was one class of mine that was keeping my textbook on back-order for whatever reason? Well, it's here now, and while my initial reaction to this was relief, it has since been replaced with gut-wrenching fear and anxiety as the realization that I have about three weeks worth of catch up work to do settles in. Needless to say, I've been managing my time well. My textbook is right beside me, the syllabus for the class is open in another window of my laptop, and I even have a pen and paper so I can take notes as I work. I have all of these things scattered across my bed, and here I am, furiously typing away at this article instead. Yeah, that's right, this whole article is one big excuse for me to hold off on all of my assignments. You can berate me all you like, but you need to realize that this is going to be one of the biggest struggles I've had to deal with since starting sophomore year. I know I complained about my eight week course last week, and trust me, that's still a huge problem, but this one might be a tad worse, given the work-load and the very limited window of opportunity I have to get it all done. It's going to be a struggle to say the least. So, to commemorate this abundance of work and how I'll pretty much be emotionally dead by the end of the day, I'll be giving you guys a small breakdown of the things I'd much rather do with my time instead of doing this work.
1. Sleep until 1 PM, wake up, look at the clock, then go right back to sleep for five more hours.
2. Watch paint dry and then take note of the differing clumps that build up once it does.
3. Spend an hour on the phone with my first crush (those of you that know the deal there know just how big of a deal this is!)
4. Dye my hair all the colors of the rainbow, then run all around the campus, hurling books at anyone I pass, singing the Reading Rainbow theme song
5. Play and beat Dark Souls: Prepare to Die Edition with the Depraved Class.
6. Compose and recite a twenty page eulogy for my shaved facial hair
7. Create a time machine to stop my freshman self from ever telling my college adviser that I wanted to take this class.
8. Yell out to the top of my lungs, on the roof of the campus "EARTH SCIENCE SUCKS!" while furiously stamping on various igneous and sedimentary rocks.
9. Adopting a small kitten and teaching it the ways of the force
10. Crawl into a small dark space and slowly await Death's sweet embrace.
Phew! Now that all of that's off my chest, I think I'm going to sign off. It's been fun stalling for time, but it wasn't meant to last forever, unfortunately. Hopefully this article hasn't been TOO nonsensical for the lot of you, and has maybe even reached at least a few of you on a personal, or even spiritual level. And if you got neither of these from it, you can at least use this as a means of inspiration for you and whoever else you're close to, to make sure that you don't wind up in the same crappy position that I'm in right now!
