We live in a world where it is common to know someone who has been sexually assaulted. It has become normal for us to know someone who has been touched in ways they did not consent to or someone who has been violated in ways they did not deserve.
The news stories are countless and the punishments never seem fair. Kesha was raped by her manager but still forced to work with him. Pictures of her sobbing in court took the internet by storm. Brock Turner was given sympathy after committing a disgusting rape. Brock's father's letter saying how hard this was for his son once again became viral. Why would one single person in our society tell these people that what they did was OK?
Have we become desensitized? As a nation, have we heard so many awful stories, whether it was someone we know personally or someone on the news that it hits us less hard each time? We say "Oh, that's so terrible," and move on. We can do more for the cause than just share an article and post an angry update on Twitter or Facebook about how "messed up" our world, forgetting about it by the time we go to sleep at night.
My heart drops every time I hear a story of a girl who had her innocence taken from her. It's not enough that these girls and women have to live through and deal with this nightmare in private, but then our media takes the worst day of their lives and broadcasts it for views, shares and profit. These victims are trapped in a never-ending hell. Assault is something you never fully come back from. After a while you think everything is OK, the nightmares and flashbacks seem to be over, but they never really are. That sense of safety so many people take for granted is forever diminished within minutes.
It is those who commit the assault that some people still have the audacity to feel sorry for. Some take pity on the men that now have to live as "sex offenders" - because living with that title is so much worse than the mental scarring that comes from being violated against your will. People side with the "poor gentleman" who is being dragged into court because some girl wants attention, when she probably really enjoyed what happened anyway - right?
No. She did not.
I am tired of turning on the news or reading headlines on my phone about how a girl was violated and yet people do not believe her or say that she was "asking for it." I never again want to see people rally around a man, or anyone who has committed sexual assault, and talk about how hard this is for them.
While I know things like this will not stop happening overnight, they definitely will not stop happening if no one does anything about it. We can stop perpetuating a culture where we make up excuses for those who assault. We can tell those who assault they are wrong and demand they take responsibility for their actions. We can stand up for, and stand beside, those who have been assaulted and give them the respect they deserve no matter what they were wearing, how much alcohol they consumed, or who they are.
My heart goes out to every victim of assault and everyone affected by it. My heart does not, however, go out to anyone who has ever assaulted another human being. Respect those who you are sharing this planet with. We are all equals and no one has the right to take advantage of or hurt anyone else. Ever.
