Season of Falling

As the weather grows colder,

our hearts begin to freeze and harden.

We grieve for those fallen,

and for all who are lost.

When the trees don colors,

and leaves begin their descent,

we mourn for the loss,t

hat alters our perceptions.

Loved ones falling, fading fast,

leaving the season,

with or without reason.

As winter approaches

our world is irrevocably transformed

leaving hearts frozen, haunted by memories

Of the season of falling.

Mom

My life was slowing to a stop

Missing every beat of her heart

"Where are you?" "How could you?"

Anger and rage consumed my heart

My life was slowing to a stop

Missing every beat of her heart

She is gone or is this not real

She was broken, she was weak

She was Mom

Brushing my hair, soothing me to sleep

Memories of a young girl, safe with her mom

Everything the same, yet now my world has changed.

The days pass slowly, questions lingering

"Where are you?" "How could you?"

No answer, no reason.

As I pick my head up and carry on

She will always be Mom.

Grief

No one speaks its name.

A darkness that hungers for heart and soul,

anger and confusion that makes no sense.

The heart tenses, constricting tight,

breathless, throat closed.

Stalking you, calling you,

holding you tight,

forgotten how to breathe,

the pain numbs into darkness.

Slowly letting go,

slipping beneath the surface.

The depths of isolated pain,

tears become invisible,

there's no one else near,

grief wraps itself around you,

whispering, "I'm here".

Humanity

As the pain sears through my chest I am reminded of my humanity.

What makes me different from the world?

Every emotion, good or bad, reminds us we are alive.

Our humanity allows us the experience of great emotions but also deep pain.

Is the universal rule that without pain we cannot find happiness?

Is this cruel or simply life? Do we fault human will or our creator?

Are these our emotions or someone else's?

Innocence

As I watch my children play,

I wonder what I will say.

The truth or lie?

Will their innocence die,

Will the light outshine the darkness?

Not everything was bad,

I was loved, you made mistakes,

The pain will fade, the memories remain.

Laughter and joy,

As I watch my children play,

I wonder what I will say.

Your grandmother will always remain.

Pages

Her comfort held in her hands,

Her home is where it takes her.

Covers of many colors,

pages of cream, ink carefully placed.

Her freedom, escape from reality.

They understand her pain, hiding from the truth.

She isn't strong enough to make it on her own.

People suffer, love that makes it through the storm, pieces glued back together.

Holding them close they are her lifeboat, her safe place.

Her comfort held in her hands, Her home is where it takes her.

Moments

The world spins round

Yet we stand still

Observing the lost souls.

Wondering why?

Love and loss, pain and hope,

all the layers of life

Sometimes we forget,

who we really are inside.

Watching from within seeing lives unfold

Is all this pain worth what we are told?

Happiness, should we be so bold?

Healing

I look at what has happened,

I will not understand.

Torn by the child within you raised,

The adult that feels betrayed.

You left us, the ones you loved

to face the demons you could no longer hide

I look back at my writing,

as my ink spills across the page,

there is only one way.

You were human.

An adult with mistakes.

And a mother that knew best,

healing is a journey; time is what we need

without you, time is all we have.

Mother's Embrace

As I long for your embrace,

only the kind a mother can give,

memories of you flood me.

I am left longing for more time.

The moments you held and kissed me,

Fixing my scrapes and bruises.

I find myself wishing and hoping,

As I long for your embrace,

For the embrace, only a mother can give.

That time has passed for us,

So I hold my children close.

Hugging and kissing them,

With the embrace, only a mother can give.

Leaving them with memories,

Hopes and wishes,

Fixing scrapes and bruises,

With the embrace, only a mother can give.

As I long for your embrace,

memories of you flood me,

While I hold my children,

With the embrace, only a mother can give.