When I started high school, I joined the International Baccalaureate (IB) program, which is a special graduation option that allows like-minded students to come together and have a well-rounded education while also earning college credit by examination, but in simpler terms, it's four years of academic hell.
The IB program, which promotes students "having a social life" mandates that students spend time having "fun" and without it, you won't complete the program and graduate. But what they don't tell you is that while having this "social life," the IB program also supplies you with an academic life. Taking five to secen college-level classes all at once, on top of extracurriculars, jobs, sports, and just basic living, causes students to struggle.
But for the few students who do make it through earn the title of being "smart." Now, I am not saying that anyone who drops the program or was never in the program isn't smart, however It's that those students who are academically advanced have a stereotype attached to this version of the word “smart.” In my peers and I's case, "smart" means better than others.
To everyone in our tiny world of IB, we didn't see a difference between us academically. We all had our strengths and weakness, and through the hell that the program put us through emotionally, mentally and physically, we grew to be a family. We supported each other whenever we needed help, just like a real family. We were all going through this journey together and we all understood what was going on in each other's lives. But everyone else in the world only saw this group of kids who excelled in the classroom, sports field, and anywhere we found ourselves, as students who could handle anything, but that'd be where they are wrong.
The summer between my sophomore and junior year, I decided to get a job at a local fast-food restaurant. During senior year, I worked three part-time jobs, tutored, played a varsity sport, volunteered, maintained a social life, and still made great grades. The normal students that worked at my job looked up to me, always saying, "We don't know how you do it." Do what? Do a million things at once and still have time to go on Netflix binges? I would usually respond with just a simple "thanks," but deep down, I knew that the answer was IB.
At my fast food job, my boss would tell me, "You're Sarah, you can do anything," and it got to the point where the level of greatness, which was expected from me, was higher than anyone else at the store. My worst was everyone else's best and it caused a giant pile of pressure to fall on my shoulders while everyone else was just living life. Granted, I was better than some but the phrase "being a Sarah" which meant being an over-energetic, stress-filled employee did get on my nerves, even if she only meant it to be a compliment.
Are you surpassing everyone's expectations and being awesome at your job? You're being a Sarah. Do something crazy and out-of-the-box even though it was the obvious answer? You're being a Sarah. Have a mental breakdown after someone tells you to slow down and stop being a screw-up? Yep, you are definitely being a Sarah.
Why was the bar for an 18 year-old who had only been working two years, being raised to the top of Mt. Everest, when 30 and 40 year-olds could get away with just smiling and standing there and get a pat on the back?
The more I openly talked about how mentally draining it was of being "smart,” the more I realized my small IB family was having the same problem and we all blamed ourselves.
But one student thought about the entire thing differently. We should take all the times we were "being a Sarah" and think of it as setting the standard for those to follow. We are creating a name for ourselves and if by doing so, we are put under pressure to the point of a breakdown, we should embrace it. It will allow us to grow as individuals and see what we are truly capable of doing.
So next time you want to motivate me by saying, "but you're *insert name* you’re a smart kid, you can do anything,” thanks but no thanks. I’d rather just be average and happy, than smart and stressed.
