I am a young female who was born with disabilities and I am faced with having to live and survive in a society that was meant for those who were more “able” bodied than those who are “disabled”. Many nights I have layed awake in bed and through my tears wonder if those who stare at me, make fun of me, disconnect from me realize that I am no different from them and want to lead a normal life just like them. I blame society, mostly, for the way that those who are disabled are treated and labeled.
The pity belongs to those who are so narrow minded that they view us and label us with the most hurtful word of all “retarded” and think we do not have the ability to function and make decisions for ourselves other than to understand their disgust and ignorance towards us. My heart feels for those who have been so scorned that they cannot look past what makes us all different and see it as a beautiful thing that we are all different.
Currently, I have come to learn that it is almost a “normal” in the world to fear and ridicule people who appear different from us. But just because you look at me and you see me as someone with a deformed arm and slight hearing loss and suffering from anxiety does not allow you to see what my character is made of or who I am inside. Believe it or not, disabled people like me only want to be treated and have the same things you “normal” beings do such as being treated as your equal, to be treated with dignity and be respected individuals.
How would you feel if I were to pass you somewhere and make fun of the way you were talking, walking or dressed? Would not feel good at all, would it? Do you see how those old sayings like, “Don’t Judge a Book by its Cover” and “Walk a Mile in Someone else’s Shoes before Passing Judgement” give meaning throughout the longest of years? I do not want to be treated any different than anyone else. The point is that I simply, along with other disabled people, want you to treat us and talk to us the same way you want to be talked to and treated… no more, no less. I encourage you to take the time to see that we are human with feelings as well as emotions just like you.
Be grateful for the fact that thanks to advancements made in technology and medicine alike disabled individuals are given a chance to live and cope with their disabilities and participate in sports, hold professional positions and engage in activities of social nature. Though we are able to cope and learn to deal with the difficulties we are faced with, the stigma that we are any less than the “norm” remains part of today’s culture.
You cannot “catch” what we have, nor can you realize how much we struggle in our daily lives just to be normal and seen as equals. Many of you are still unaware of how to treat us and shy away from your own fears and phobias. Just as I would not hesitate to help pick up a book you dropped please take the time to help that person in a wheelchair by opening a door for them, or just smile at that deaf person in the elevator near you. Remember, those who have vision troubles may be afraid to ask someone to help with guidance, someone with downs syndrome may be in need of help to get something from up on a shelf or to read something, so why not simply ask them if you could help them? You would not hesitate to help a sibling or parent would you; disabled are no different. Without caring people who are not disabled who plays the part of helping those who can’t help themselves survive in this cold and heartless world? I encourage you so see how far a simple gesture like a smile, eye contact or even saying “hello” can go in making someone’s whole outlook change in that one moment.
You must also remember that all disabilities are not easy to see, like someone who has no limbs, is blind or has a wheelchair. Many have hidden disabilities like depression, anxiety, bipolar disease, autism or Asperger’s and still needs to manage daily challenges, yet the worst part for us is the feeling of being isolated from you so called normal people. Be open-minded, patient and accept our differences and grow.
Besides all this, we when you really look into those who have made huge contributions in society, you most definitely will come across so many courageous handicapped people who refuse to overburden themselves with their disability and go on to live a fulfilling life. Some examples are Stephen Hawking, Temple Grandin, Lauren Potter, (I myself was a High School Heisman School Winner not so long ago) and the list goes on. I find it really commendable to be part of such an amazing and unique group of stand-out people knowing our disability and overcoming it with so much courage and willpower because it truly isn’t a small deal. Today, the disabled play sports, act, write and do almost everything like a normal person in spite of the fact that every now and then things may need to be done differently, but they learn to beat the challenges and live a happier life.
In closing, I hope many of you will stop focusing so much on our disabilities and learn to focus on our personalities. It is not a person’s fault if he/she is disabled in any way, shape or form because our disabilities are just a part of who we are and what makes us unique, but making it an issue and calling someone “handicapped, retarded or special” makes us feel underappreciated and loved. I can’t wait to see you on campus and hope you won’t be afraid to take the time to know me, in fact I encourage you to come see my teammates and I play softball for BSU this spring. I’ll be that girl on the mound who even though she has a “disability” will be showing you that my “ability” trumps everything else.
