Hey there. Have you noticed how I didn’t say hello but I used a more casual and social greeting? Maybe you did. Maybe you didn’t. Most likely you did, however, because you harped on every single thing in your life and making sure it was perfect. I remember when you had cried the first time you got a B in THIRD GRADE. I remember when you thought a B- was failure. Not earning positions or accolades you really wanted made you get down on yourself. “Am I even smart? Why didn’t I get it? What’s the difference between me and him/her?” you would ask in your mind. To most people, these worries would sound a bit crazy but to you they were normal things that frequently occurred. Little did you know that it would take something that turned your life upside down to realize how little these things truly mean in life. It took starting a new life for you.

For you, or perhaps the old me, a terrible accident occurred but for others, something so much smaller and less drastic will make them see that they were wrong. Maybe they haven’t even discovered this yet. This is to all of you. All of the people who have strived for perfect grades on your transcript and perfect marks on your resume. A perfect life. Anything less than amazing was/is not acceptable. But why? To what will it truly matter if you get a B or a C on your report card? To what will it truly matter if you don’t win this competition? Guess what? Employers do NOT receive your transcripts from your college when you apply for a job. Those grades you’re not proud of just need to be passing and then you’re good to go. There are no repercussions. The only consequence is your hurt ego but why must it be hurt? Disappointment for a short while is the worst that it should be because it doesn’t matter what grades you got. Pass your classes and obtain the GPA you need to keep your scholarship if you have one and nothing else matters. For losing a competition, there is no doubt that there will be one very similar in the future. If there isn’t, wait a year until it opens up again. I am the most impatient person there is it seems sometimes so if I can wait, so can you. Take pride in being happy for the person who won even if it wasn’t you. They may have needed it more than you do now.

So stop putting yourself on a pedestal. The worst thing, even worse than not meeting someone else’s expectations, is not meeting your own for yourself. We all need to lower our mental requirements on what makes us smart, what makes us a great person. Smart and great people do not have clear, defining requirements in the dictionary or on the internet that you must meet. So who can tell you that you aren’t smart or a great person? No one. They will have no proof. If they say “well you got a D on that one paper” that’s an invalid argument. No one said that if you don’t get an A in that class that you aren’t smart. This just may not be your niche. That is perfectly fine and what majors are designed for in college. To work on your niche.

To sum it all up to both my old self and you, there are only a few words I have for you. Give yourself a break.