My name was said... Everyone stranding ovation. I still remember wining the award. I stood up, shaking; it was so my anxiety that I couldn't even smile. I felt ashamed about it. Usually, when you're awarded with something you show gratitude, but in my case, though I was grateful and excited, there was something that didn't let me express that, but instead, projecting an image that was out of my control. This was my first encounter with severe anxiety, which later on started projecting in different areas of my life. It destroyed most of my friendships, my social life, and the core of my identity was questioned up to a sickening point.

As most of us, we think that anxiety is something that we can control. "Just breathe"- They say. Sure... It may work sometimes, but what can you do when you start trembling in front of everybody? when your hands get numb as you try to push yourself farther from yourself? Hence, trying to show the world a face that isn't yourself; a fake confidence.

It was so my anxiety, that I would start trembling when someone would take a picture of me [with friends], or even when meeting with someone. I would start shaking and I couldn't even form concrete thoughts. I felt such an incompetence. I would consider myself as someone who excels in everything proposed, but at that moment, I felt like the weakest person in the world. "So I'll just dump everything that I've built just for my anxiety?" I thought to myself. What a dumb idea...

The desperation was tough. I tired so many methods to reduce my anxiety: Medication, breathing techniques, and meditation. Nothing worked. I thought that all my live would revolve around my anxiety. I didn't want to, I have much to offer to the world than my anxiety and lack of confidence.

Everyday was a fight, a fight with myself. Every morning I couldn't do my daily routine because my anxiety would make me sick to the stomach by just thinking about school. I constantly found myself in situations were I forced myself to interact "as normal as possible".

I think it started from my lack of confidence as a kid; I never believed I was enough -was I? I never felt I belonged to something. I never believed in myself. I constantly felt alone, and still to these days I remind myself about it. Usually I'm optimistic, I love to have a good laugh, to draw, paint, play the piano -occasionally- and watch Netflix. I bet that the way I'm describing myself makes you imagine me as the most depressed person in the world, so I want to remind you that I love to do several activities, but I made them even though my anxiety would challenge me on a daily basis.

Nonetheless, it kept being an important part of my life a whole year, and then, when school finished, I decided to end it. And to end it, I mean work on it. So I kept doing the usual meditation and breathing techniques, but I stopped with the medication. I also started exercising twice a week or so. I felt great. I started reminding myself the positive things about me: "I'm smart, I'm intelligent, I'm a good person, I'm loved." I also started promoting positivity on a daily basis, thus, by using positive and inspirational quotes on my devices. It sounds so cheesy, but you know what? It worked!

To be honest, I still don't feel completely liberated from my anxiety, but I'm pretty sure that it has drastically been reduced up to a point were its not limiting my capacities. I feel great.

For the people who are in the same position that I was, keep it up! Believe in yourself, because the only limits that exist are the ones that you put to yourself. And don't forget that hard roads lead to beautiful destinations.