Addiction is an illness in itself, varying from alcohol to excessive amount of coffee. Sometimes our addictions take over who we are as people. Not saying your coffee is out to get you, but some addictions are worse than others. We probably can't remember down to the exact moment of when our addiction began but we know and have recognized that it has become an issue. There's two choices when it comes down to it, we can either better ourselves and break the bad habits we let control us. Or, we continue down the path were on, letting our demons take over.
Even after we chose to rid ourselves of what brings us down, we may fall back into the groove of our old ways. This is known as relapse. We may take this tragic moment in our recovery as the worst thing to happen, but we can't beat ourselves up over it. We are not weak, we just tripped and stumbled a little bit. It doesn't mean we are not strong or that we don't deserve a chance to be free from the weight that has brought us down for years.
In order to cope with relapse we must forgive ourselves. It is not easy but in the end it's worth it. Identifying our triggers to what makes us go back to who we once were can help us avoid these wrong turns. We take these triggers and we keep them locked away in the back of our minds, holding onto them for dear life, praying we can keep our broken, glued pieces together.
Once time passes and we become stronger from the battle we will win, we start to see we don't need to keep our triggers on our minds because they will no longer be the little things that set us back three steps. They will become a thing of the past just like our addictions. We will be able to look our demons square in the face and know they have nothing over us. Our demons will have vanished into thin aiir and we won't be afraid of them anymore. They will no longer have a grasp on who we have become.
We will be able to wake up one day realizing the amonut of time since relapse was so long ago. We will be able to look at ourselves in the mirror and know that though it was a horrible choice, we are strong.
