Although Demi Lovato, Russell Brand, Portia de Rossi, Zoë Kravitz, Kate Winslet, Janet Jackson, Princess Diana of Wales, Jane Fonda and more have come out and spoken about eating disorders, they are still a taboo topic and something that people still get shamed for. Unfortunately, throughout history, mainstream media has reinforced negative stereotypes about eating disorders, and with that, encouraged people to reinforce these ideas. Now, let's get on the same page. Eating disorders are believed to derive from a combination of psychological, biological, & environmental abnormalities in a person's life. So with that being said, there are a lot of people who know what to say, and not to say to a person who struggles with one of Anorexia, Bulimia, and Binge Eating Disorder. However, there are still many people who don't know what to say. So for those of you who don't (or who may have already stepped in the ish), this is for you.
1. You're not thin enough to be anorexic or bulimic
Okay, so this is where media has pushed stereotypes on you, so let me help you with this. I'm going to make this crystal clear. IT DOES NOT MATTER WHAT SIZE A PERSON IS. THEY CAN STILL HAVE ANOREXIA OR BULIMIA. And you pointing out their size does not help the matter. In fact, it could actually feed into the mindset of needing to lose more and more weight.
2. B.E.D. is just an excuse for you to eat more.
Actually, eating disorders have to be diagnosed by a psychologist and then you work with a team of doctors to work on recovery. So I'm fairly sure that if I just wanted to eat, it wouldn't warrant a clinical psychologist, nutritionist, etc.
3. If you would just eat, you could get better.
Well I guess we should just fire the physicians and psychologists that actually went to school for this and hire you since you understand the intricate workings of the mind. (That's sarcasm).
4. If you would eat in moderation you could get better
Really? I'm sure the person with B.E.D. never thought of that.
5. I wish that I had the will power to be anorexic/bulimic. I could lose so much weight
This is actually part of a comment made by a celebrity during a story that was being told on an American talk show (it was a guest not a host). But, I'm sorry...what? You want(ed) to make yourself sick and hurt your body so you can lose weight? It isn't will power that makes someone become anorexic/bulimic, it is a mix of psychological, biological, & environmental abnormalities in a person's life. And trust me, it is not something that is an easy thing to live with. You don't want to live like this if you don't have too!
6. Well just schedule your meal times to cure your B.E.D/Anorexia/Bulimia
I'm sure that anyone with B.E.D./anorexia/bulimia has never thought of that. Oh wait, they probably have. Along with which new fad diet to try, how to lose weight, etc. Please look up the symptoms of these disorders before saying something like this.
7. What took so long in the bathroom? Were you throwing up again?
Dude, seriously? Not Okay...AT ALL!
8. Why don't you eat healthier? or Do you really want to eat that?
Honestly, you just shouldn't say this to anybody.
9. You're looking bigger/thinner, does that mean you're eating disorder is gone?
No Debra, it doesn't. It means that treatment is working and the person you're talking to most likely still struggles with the urges to binge, purge, or restricting themselves from food. It takes time to get better. Chill dude.
10. But you've been in treatment forever!
I'll repeat myself (grabs megaphone and clears throat) IT TAKES TIME TO RECOVER FROM AN EATING DISORDER!
11. Are you doing this for attention?
Nobody would either pretend to have, or develop an eating disorder for attention. Like I said before, people with eating disorders are treated by physicians and psychologists.
