We're all familiar with the sentiments "you're beautiful the way you are" and "you don't need to change a thing." They're old feel-good adages that mean well but are difficult to accept and believe when we're bombarded from childhood with images and expectations of what we're "supposed" to look like.
From the time we're children and pretty much constantly forever after that, we are overwhelmed with images and messages regarding how we should look. Every day, television, magazines, and the internet show us images of "flawless" models and celebrities, or else headlines like "Lose 30 Pounds in 10 Days With This Method!" and "Do THIS to Make Stretch Marks Disappear!" We've all seen it, and perhaps been enticed by it a few too many times. We're made to believe that we have to change, and that's not fair.
However, we also live in a time where body positivity and diversity is being encouraged and celebrated more and more, and I'm here to add to that. Here are 10 things about bodies you've been told to change, but in fact don't need changing at all.
1. Body Fat
When it comes to the media's idea of body image, fat (the noun as well as the descriptor) = bad. It's etched into our brains that we should have barely any fat on our bodies. However, your body needs fat for energy, and even protection. You have so many important organs, and body fat acts as a protective cushion. Also, even if you have a little extra, that doesn't mean you're overweight (the ideal amount of body fat for your body type is a range) and certainly doesn't, and shouldn't, mean anything when it comes to beauty. It all depends on your build and your body's needs.
2. Stretch Marks
Though they're often associated with pregnant women, stretch marks are a completely natural result of growing a lot, and really fast. I have stretch marks everywhere - on my legs, hips, arms, and even chest — because I had a huge growth spurt as a young teenager, as most kids do. There's not much you can do about stretch marks, but that's okay - usually they're barely visible, and it just means your body has accommodated your rapid growth.
3. Cellulite
Cellulite is simply subcutaneous (right under the skin) body fat that causes a dimpled look on your skin. Looking up cellulite online, you'll find ways to "treat" it, articles that call it a "condition that affects many women," and "methods to get rid of it." However, it's difficult (if not impossible) to get rid of, and it's certainly not a "condition;" it's not the result of something gone wrong, and nearly everyone has it — about 91 percent of women have it...so why is it dubbed a "condition" that "affects" people? Don't buy into it — almost everyone has it somewhere, and that's because it's just a natural part of bodies.
4. Bloating at Night
I shouldn't really say "bloating," but rather when you're stomach isn't as flat at night as it is in the morning. This is a big one because a huge part of the perception of how bodies should look is a flat stomach, but that expectation is not realistic. If you've eaten and nourished your body and given it what it needs throughout the day, your stomach should not be flat. Think about it — if your stomach couldn't expand to accommodate what you feed it, that would be so painful! It's just a natural part of the process.
5. Body Hair
Especially for women, body hair is treated in such a strange way. This completely normal aspect of human bodies is acceptable and encouraged on their heads, but other than that, they're expected to be smooth and shaven, making it look like hair never has, and never will, grow in those areas! Decisions about body hair should be completely personal, and for women, deciding to keep it anywhere else besides your head should not make you uncomfortable — it grows there naturally, it's just what bodies look like! (Though if you're more comfortable shaving, then that's okay too).
6. Darkness Under Your Eyes
Often, darkness under your eyes is associated with being stressed out or tired and considered unsightly. Many people use creams or makeup to hide this dark skin. The skin under your eyes is very thin, making it easy for the blood there to show through, which can result in a blue-ish tone. Skin that looks brown under your eyes is caused by hyperpigmentation triggered by things including sun exposure or genetics. These are natural reactions taking place, and though you can easily take care of it, it should not be judged or make you feel self-conscious. It's just another thing bodies naturally do.
7. Off-White or Crooked Teeth
Of course, sometimes people's teeth grow in totally weird (I was one of those middle schoolers with snaggleteeth) and in those cases, braces and other dental work are necessary. However, many people have slightly crooked teeth and fixing it is purely cosmetic. Whether they fix them or not is a personal decision — and if it will boost your confidence then absolutely go for it! - but teeth are another thing that society expects to be perfect. Slightly crooked teeth that don't cause problems are totally fine, and realistically no one else probably notices. As for whiteness, teeth are not naturally bright sparkling white. Think of all the things you eat and drink all day - you can't expect your teeth to be pure white all the time. Of course, there are products and things you can do to whiten them - but this is just temporary. And when you see people's bright white teeth on magazine covers, know they're probably not real; lighting and photo-shop work wonders.
8. Scars
Sometimes scars from surgeries or serious accidents can cause self-consciousness or discomfort, and that's understandable. Here, I'm talking more about scars from day to day cuts and scrapes. I have plenty, from being a totally clumsy kid...and adult. My hands and legs are so covered in scars I don't even know how many I have, and I'm sure a lot of people can relate. This is kind of just the result of living. When scarring occurs, your body basically produces thicker skin in the place of the cut to make that area less vulnerable. There are things you can do to reduce the prominence of scars — like creams or even coconut oil — but personally, I think scars are kind of cool, and many have interesting stories behind them.
9. Birthmarks
Birthmarks are another part of bodies that can be circumstantial. I know people who have birthmarks on their upper bodies or faces — so they're very prominent — who have wanted them removed (I also know people who have them and embrace them). Sometimes they're large and discolored and I understand that this can cause problems with self-consciousness or people making cruel comments. Generally, though, birthmarks are just something people are born with that are a unique part of them.
10. Freckles
I don't really have anything insightful to say here, I just don't understand why people don't like freckles! They're like little constellations on your skin, they're unique and beautiful and so cool. I don't have tons of freckles myself, but I get them on the bridge of my nose in the middle of the summer and I love them. Freckles are gorgeous.
There are so many things about our bodies that we're told we need to change, and expectations that we try to live up to that we'll never be able to. Most of the things on this list are things I relate to, or have felt self-conscious about, but am learning to accept and embrace and love — and I hope you can too. Body positivity and acceptance is so important to our well-being, and realizing how diverse bodies are is part of that. Everyone deserves to feel beautiful in their skin.
