Breaking up is never easy, add college into the equation and your world might feel like it's ending. With the current college dating culture, you may be quick to get a tinder and try to get back out there to later find yourself on alcohol and red bull fueled bender wondering why you’re alone. From drowning your sorrows in tequila and bad reality television or not leaving your bed for days, a lot of the coping habits of us 20-somethings are not so healthy. I asked some of the people in my life (and some strangers) their best break up advice, and here’s what I got:
1. “College is all about your life-long girlfriends. Don’t let a boy define your college career and make you upset.”
This one really rings true. All too often we get caught up in the dating scene when we don’t have to at all. College should be about stumbling home with your girlfriends and finding yourself at after-hours dancing until 4 a.m., then waking up and recapping your nights (I mean, besides that education thing). These are the people you’ll still have around when you’re 50. If you make your college career about a guy, then you will be miserable. Enjoy the good times, meet new people, and laugh a lot.
2. “Ignore him and you will find much, much better ... he doesn’t have brain.”
This lovely quote from a 40-something Syrian woman pretty much explains that bad relationships are universal.
3. “Never run back to what broke you ... but the best part? You are not broken, you are just getting stronger. Every day is a new day and you are free.”
Sometimes we really need to be reminded that what might feel like is tearing us apart, is really making us stronger. Rejection hurts, but what hurts worse is repeating the cycle and going back to the same person. Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. Take these hardships and grow from them, find opportunities out of the negative.
4. “The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else *insert eggplant emoji here*.”
This is not a piece of advice that everyone should follow, and not one that I personally did but I think what you can take out of it is that sometimes distraction is the best way to get over someone. Don’t get too caught up in your rebound, but if that’s what it takes then go for it. Don’t go making out with every guy you see, but if you want to explore your options, why not? You only college once and this isn’t acceptable probably anywhere else.
5. “Take time to yourself and reflect, and just focus on you.”
This is probably the most important piece of advice of them all. Focus on yourself, give yourself the time you need, and work on becoming the best version of yourself. Sometimes we give so much in a relationship that we lose ourselves. This is the time to get the most important person in your life back: you. Whether your way of taking time to yourself is eating your weight in fries or surrounding yourself with people you love, there is no wrong way to do it. You can be completely selfish now and just do you.
So, however you decide to cope, just make sure that you are doing it for yourself. Ignore the person who hurt you, focus on the people who love you, and realize that you are getting strong every day. When all else fails, just write it out. Call me the Taylor Swift of entertainment and life journalism, but take my advice, because it sure as hell helps.
