letter to my ex | The Odyssey Online
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relationships

I Can't Make You Happy But I Can Make Myself Happy

You taught me to be stronger than I thought I was.

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I Can't Make You Happy But I Can Make Myself Happy

I remember the first time I met you. You were someone who I thought completed me, but little did I know you were someone else.

Six months of our relationship was good until January when you said something that crushed my self-image. My self-esteem was bad enough before you came into my life and you were the last person I had ever thought would emotionally hurt me. Looks are not everything and I had tried to be the best that I could around you. I was never perfect but I tried to accept you for who you were.

You told me that I looked like a woman who had let herself go. And I would look in the mirror every day and question my worth. I woke up every day and questioned my existence. And most of all, I had looked at you and questioned my trust and love for you.

I remember sitting across from my therapist and admitting to him that I had cheated on you. You may think I only had once but to be honest I did it more than that. I don't regret cheating on you but what I do regret is staying with you when I was broken inside. Sex from another guy was a way to boost my self-esteem. It was why we never had major issues until I went home for the summer and saw you again.

I had let myself go to the point that I ended up constantly talking down on you and disrespecting you. I let myself become this jealous and aggressive person because of the way you viewed me and showed no appreciation or support for me.

After we broke up I realized how true my former therapist's words were and how I need to be accountable for myself. That is when I started to let go of those feelings I had towards you and improve my feelings towards myself.

Looking back I learned a few things. I learned to not settle for less than I deserve because I know I deserve someone who loves me for me. If someone respects me I will respect them. I also learned that I cannot make you happy but I can make myself happy. No matter how sexy a woman is for you or the things she does for you, you probably will never be happy because I realized you were insecure and unhappy with your life yourself.

I don't hate you for anything but at the same time, I will be hurt for a while. The only karma I want is me one day being happier, and prettier while you watch me live life and regret those words you told me.

Good luck and goodbye.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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