You'll have to excuse me if this seems like a vent session but I'm mostly writing this because I know you'll read it all, or at least I'm hoping you do. Not only am I hoping that this helps you but I am also trying to help myself as I write this.

No need to worry I am fine. This just helps me think and contemplate my being here.

I am at a moment in time in which I am in full control. I choose when to sleep, I choose what to eat and I choose who I associate myself with. I'll admit that this enables me to do many things that I probably shouldn't do that'll only leave me exhausted. Despite having the lack of energy to do most of the things that I should be doing, I can finally say that I feel fine. The friends I've been able to make and keep for this long are the ones that I'll likely invite to my wedding day. If and only if that ever happens.

Of course, there are still a few things currently happening that I need to work on, like my disorganized lifestyle and inability to keep an exercise routine. I stare at myself in the mirror for too long because I know what parts of my body needs work. My brain is still wired to pick out my imperfections because I am the best judge for myself. Not because I know myself better but because I learned to keep out the negative things that everyone else had to say. Still, I don't think I've felt this comfortable with myself before. I've learned to cope with what I have and who I am thus far.

I am Saturday mornings with siblings and cartoons. I am a klutz who does not know how to wake up early. I am a blabbermouth that can't help it because I finally have someone that'll listen. I was a lost black sheep that strayed too far from the herd and had to make a new one. Now I am home and even though it needs work, it is where I feel safe and it is where anyone is welcome.

I love me and I am finally able to say I love you. I don't think I could've ever said that prior to this moment and truly mean it. Now it's your turn, love yourself and love me.