I distance myself from people for reason. I would rather surround my self with good people who make honest mistakes and admit them, than to surround myself with those who think they make none. I guess I've already lived my wild streak and I wasn't impressed. In fact I was hurt, and even worst I hurt others.

I will not apologize for my big heart. I can't apologize for the way my mother raised me, I'm a child of God and it's best I be acting that way. It's not that I'm a prude, I just think I deserve someone special. And "Hey babe." isn't going to get me. I don't need to waste my time on someone who only wants me for my looks.

I don't need to waste my time on someone who only wants me when it fits their needs.

Call me old fashioned, but I expect to be the only girl in your life. I expect to be treated like a princess. I intend to make you feel like you hold the world in your hands. I'm not your average girl, therefore I won't settle for your average guy. However, he make look average to others. You don't have to be perfect, you don't have to be the best looking, and you don't need to own all the land in the county. All I ask is for you to respect me, my choices, and beliefs. In exchange I'll give you all I have in my heart and soul.

I know longer have the energy for meaningless friendships, forced interactions, or unnecessary conversations. I'm learning to love the sound of my feet walking away from things that aren't meant for me. I'd rather be alone from something that I chose.

I found peace in willing to lose connection with the people, places, and things causing noise. I distanced myself to save myself. I just figured there is no point in wasting your sanity in a friendship/relationship you know is fake. When things no longer connect you have to have the courage to pack your things and wait for that better partner. Maybe they'll never come but you've learned to accept that.

Do yourself a favor and let you heart heal before you open another door. It wasn't just feelings I hurt. It was my image. My name. My heart. And those will never fully recover. It doesn't matter the amount of mistakes you made. People love to talk and they'll form their own opinions of you. If you're going to give them something to talk about, let it be their jealousy of your independence. Your will to succeed.

There comes a time when you just have to stop watering dead plants sweetheart.Be wise enough not to waste your time, patient enough not to settle, and strong enough to make it on your own. We all have that one person we wasted too much time on. Too much heart on. Too much precious water on. Sometimes you fall in 'love' to come to a realization that "This isn't love." And that's okay. Sometimes you need to find that much love for yourself.

Wear your fur coat. Wear your dark lipstick and smokey eye shadow. Make them look, and make them look again. Love yourself and be confident in who you are. The rest will fall into place, and never be afraid of being 'intimidating.' The one worth having won't be intimidated, in fact he might find this tough act you put on funny. He might throw your sarcasm and sass right back with a cool voice. And that's when you know, this could be the one.

Until next time,

-A Strong, Unapologetic Girl

xoxo