When I was growing up, I was surrounded by adult relationships. Whether it was my mom with a boyfriend or her friends with their husbands and wives, I was always exposed to some sort of romantic relationship. Almost all of the relationships I saw, including my parents', were very chaotic. They were chaotic in the sense that something was always happening. Someone was always unhappy or anxious or screaming or crying. Growing up around that transformed me into an anxious and chaotic person. I was never at peace or satisfied with anything, especially my relationships. I always thought there had to be chaos, and if that meant I had to create some, then so be it. It was all I knew how to do.
This past fall, I met a boy. Among all the noise and the chaos within my mind and in my life, I met a boy. And he stayed. The question as to why still lingers into my thoughts every now and then, but I'm just thankful he did. Because he stayed, I have gotten to experience the most peaceful and relaxing relationship I have ever seen, let alone be in. They say sometimes home isn't four walls, it's two eyes and a heartbeat, and that couldn't be more true. Just the mere presence of him keeps my mind and my thoughts at bay, which is more refreshing than anything.
You see, love shouldn't be chaos. Love isn't slamming doors or going to bed angry. It isn't crying and screaming because you can't take the silence any longer. It isn't going days without talking to each other out of spite or bashing each other on social media. Love is none of those things. When you fall in love with the right person, love is the easiest thing in the world. Love is communicating with one another and building each other up. Love is coming home at night and being able to leave all your troubles at the door because the person that's asleep in your bed can ease your mind that easily. Love is being comfortable and being able to be yourself around that person. Eventually, you wonder how you ever made it without this person, simply because in them, you have found a home. Loving the right person the right way is peaceful and calming. And it's one of the easiest things you could ever do.
