For those of you who have never seen the movie Love and Basketball, here is a little synopsis:

It all started in 1981, in Los Angeles, California. Eleven year old Monica moved next door to Quincy McCall, a boy that was just as passionate about basketball as her. As they grew into adulthood, they ended up dating and falling in love with each other. In this movie, Monica and Quincy are trying to navigate their complicated path of romance and basketball. The young couple struggled to make their relationship work, so Quincy decided to end the relationship. He tried to move on with his life by getting engaged to another woman, but Monica never stopped loving him. With both of their pro-basketball careers at a crossroads, a few years later they met again. Monica decided to initiate one final game of one-on-one, in which they played for each other’s hearts. At the end of the game, Quincy realized that he never stopped loving Monica either. They reconciled their relationship, and ended up with a happily ever after love story.

1. Your first kiss should have at least been five seconds.

When Quincy and Monica were 11 years old, they shared their first together. They were on their way to the first day of school, and Quincy asked Monica if she wanted to be his girlfriend. When she agreed, he told her that they needed to kiss. Monica asked him for how long, and he replied, five seconds.

So think back to your first real kiss – was it at least for five seconds? Because clearly that’s the only way to really validate a first real kiss.

2. Always believe in yourself, even when others are doubting you.

Monica was in love with the game of basketball since she was 11 years old. People doubted her, her entire life. Even her parents told her that she most likely wasn’t going to get recruited to play at the University of Southern California. But guess what? She did, and even though she started off warming the bench, she ended up being the team’s starting point guard. After college, she went overseas for a while, and ended up playing in the WNBA.

Monica worked her butt off, and she never gave up despite all of the hate that she received from everyone. This just shows that if you are really passionate about your craft, anything is possible for you.

Let all of the negativity be your motivation to do what people said you were not capable of doing.

3. Ladies, always keep it classy.

Monica had always been a tom-boy. One of the very few times that she ever wore a dress was when she attended her school’s spring dance. When she sat down to take a seat, she must have forgotten that she was wearing a dress, because she left her legs wide open and flashed a few guys her panties. (Awkward).

Now ladies, I know what you all are thinking. Well, at least she was wearing panties – right? Well . . .Wrong. I know that we are in college, and we want to be Young Wild and Free, but remember, we’re women first, and we have to keep it classy.

4. It’s OKAY to choose you.

One night, Quincy and Monica were sitting outside on their school’s football bleachers. At this time, he was going through some hardship, so he was venting to Monica. At one point in the conversation, Monica looked up at the time and noticed it was almost past her curfew. When she told Quincy that she had to go back to her dorm, he asked her not to leave – but she did because if she stayed, she could’ve risked losing her starting basketball position.

This scene is very controversial because some people believe that she should have stayed, and some believe that she made the right decision. In my opinion, she made the right choice. Sometimes in life, you have to be selfish and do what’s right for yourself. Also, if someone really loves you, and accepts you for who you are, then they would not make you choose between them and something that you love just as equally.

5. Always fight for what really matters to you.

When Monica left the night she had curfew, it really put a wedge in her and Quincy’s relationship. He felt like she wasn’t supporting him, so he decided to break up with her. Monica was left heartbroken, and was never able to move on. However, Quincy got engaged to another woman. This didn’t sit well with Monica, so she knew she had to do something about it.

When Monica and Quincy were in college, they played a 1 on 1 game of basketball. Monica won the game, and it was because he let her. He said he wanted her to win (because he loved her). So even though Quincy was about to get married in two weeks, Monica came up with idea to play one final game of 1 on 1 – for each other’s hearts. She said that if she won, it was because deep down he still loved her too. If she lost, then she would know that it was over. It was a really big risk, but a risk she was willing to take.

Put yourself out there, and take a chance. If you don’t, you could be missing out on so many opportunities. Always remember that the sky’s the limit, so never stop reaching for the stars!

6. What’s meant to be will always find its way.

At the end of the basketball match, Quincy ended up winning the game. You could tell from Monica’s eyes that she was devastated because she realized that she just lost the love of her life. However, as she began to walk away from Quincy, he said double or nothing. That was his way of telling Monica that he still loved her and still wanted to be with her. They ended up getting married, having a child together, and living happily ever after.

When Monica began to walk off, I am sure that it took everything in her to get herself to leave. Being without Quincy is not something that she wanted, but sometimes you just have to let it go. If you truly love someone, you have to give him or her the freedom to choose for themselves. If he or she decides to come back, it’s because the feelings are mutual. If they don’t come back, you would have only been holding on to something that was never really there in the first place.