It’s the night before leaving for a new place and a new job. You’ve packed your things and now you’re trying to get your head around the fact that in a matter of hours, your life will be completely different.
We’ve all been there.
We’ve all been in those moments when we’re transitioning from one thing to the next. Be it from high school to college or from one job to another, we’ve all had those moments when we switch from where we’re at now to something else. And some people handle transitions well. Some people look forward to it, even. But for others of us, transition can be hard. It can be daunting. It can be nerve-wracking to the point where it makes our anxiety take over. And me, I’m in that second group.
I’m that person that hates transition.
I’ve never liked the unknown. In fact, it terrifies me. I like staying in my comfort zone where there are people I know and things I know how to do. So, transitioning from that to something else is always a huge task for me. My anxiety works overtime. What if I don’t like what I’m about to be doing? What if I don’t make any friends? What if I can’t find my way? All of these questions and then some start racing through my brain—to the point where sleep is something I can expect not to get. The fear and my anxiety take control of my headspace.
I always think of how long whatever I’m doing next will be.
I always think of how saying goodbye to my dog, again, is virtually impossible, especially since when he greeting me a couple days before, he was wiggling with excitement to see me. I’m always afraid that the next time I come home, he won’t care about me because I’m in and out so frequently. I always think of how where I’m going, there’ll be no one I know. And I know there’s a bright side. I know I’m doing something to better my future. I know I’m doing something that is just the next leg of my journey. I know it’s all according to God’s plan. But in the moments of packing everything up and transitioning, my brain just cannon focus on that bright side. The fear sets in and firmly plants itself until I get to where I’m going and I realize it’s not that bad. Eventually, most of the time, I end up happy and having a good time and learning a lot, but it’s not until that happens that that part of my brain that gets paralyzed with fear shuts off.
So for those of you that hate transition, I get it.
Other people might not get it, but I do. You’re not alone. And for those of you that like transition and like taking on new things, I’m so happy for you. It’s like I always tell myself and my friends: in the long run, things in life have a way of working out. This life is a constant reminder of that.
