I’m still young. That’s what everyone tells me; at least, until I go to work and kids ask me who my husband is and how many kids I have. Then, I realize that maybe I’m not so young, and though I have a lot of learning left to do and a lot of life left to live, there are some things that I will never enjoy again, some roads I will never again journey down, and some obstacles that will no longer rear their ugly head at me.

Throughout the 20-some years I have been around, I’ve noticed a few things and learned a few others. No, I’m not wise and elderly, but I am young and retrospective, and while I know life to be a beautiful thing, I also know life is tricky and truths are hard to come by. These are my truths, though, and until I reach the other side of 30, 40, 50, and so on, I’m still going to try and figure the rest out.

You’ll learn that there are people who do things, and there are people who watch things happen. People who advocate, and people who complain. People who wander and people who stay.

You’ll learn that working hard doesn’t always translate to an A. Sometimes, it’s just the school, or your major, or your professor. And, sometimes, it’s just a case of a subject your brain isn’t wired to understand perfectly, and you’ll keep desperately working hard just to keep your head bobbing above the waters as the tide threatens to swallow you whole.

You’ll learn that opportunities aren’t necessarily always given to those who have earned it or those who deserve it most, but those who can work the system, who can network, who can be personable. Be like them. Beat them at their own game. Don’t settle for defeat and throw your hands up in the air, screaming, “It’s just not fair!” No one will pity you, and you’ll only resent yourself more.

You’ll learn that midnight snacking is a blessing, but mostly a curse -- so stop while you still have your youthful metabolism.

You’ll learn that things will always go wrong when you least expect it, or feel least ready for it. Laptops break, friends break promises, and papers don’t always get the reception you hoped for. It’s not the end of the world, or life as you know it. It’s a challenge, and it’s a speed bump. Treat it as such, with caution and patience and calm – as much as you can muster – and then carry on with your life.

You’ll learn that all-nighters are unavoidable for some people, but you’ll also learn that it is possible to not become one of these people. Getting work done during the day in between classes or before work can help you avoid seeing 4 a.m. blinking on your laptop night after night. It’s possible, I swear.

You’ll learn that the world you live in, the world you were raised in, is not a universal world. It is far different than that of your friend, your roommate, your professor, your teammate. And you need to respect that.

You’ll learn that freshman dorms are the most awful, stuffy, invasive spaces where you share bathroom space with strangers and try not to play your music too loud (even though it’s Friday night and you really want to). But more importantly, they are the last time you will be surrounded by your peers in such close proximity, sharing not only rooms and floors, but also secrets and laughs with 40 other people. Don’t wish these days away while you have them -- you’ll look back and remember freshmen year dorm life fondly, I promise you (unless your roomie was nuts, in which case I can only apologize).

You’ll learn that it’s better to be the person who has too many obligations, meetings, and events than the one who makes dinner at home every night before settling in with their fifth episode of the day. It’s better to be the person who runs into class frazzled and a minute late because they got caught up saying hello to so many people than the one who stares at the ground and avoids eye contact with absolutely everyone while their music resonates the sound of loneliness through their earphones.

You’ll learn that people change. Hell, you’ll watch people change. They grow, they develop passions and interests, they get busy, they stop answering, they move away, they get caught up in a bad crowd, they work all the time, they switch majors, they cause drama, they listen, they mend your broken heart, and they follow their own. Let them. Just because you once shared everything with each other doesn’t mean you have to fight to stay friends when you’re changing too much.

People will try to tell you who you are, who you can be, and who they think you should be. They will mold you into a cocoon of their choosing if you let them. Others will not. Others will inform you of your options, of your potential, and then they will step back. They will let your wings fly as they will, fall as they may. And then they will be there to pick you up and encourage you to continue, to start again.

Listen to others, but listen to yourself first. It will be OK, or so they tell me. But at the end of the day, I’m only 20. I’m young, and I have a lot of learning left to do. And I intend on doing just that.