Life Is Unfair- And That's Okay

Life Is Unfair- And That's Okay

I realized that unfairness is okay by accepting my trials.

All my 18 years of wisdom and thorough experience has led me to believe this: life is like super hard.

This first hit me when I got my period at 11 years old. I didn’t really get it. Before I received the infamous curse of womanhood I thought my period would make me feel feminine and womanly and proud. The rude awakening that I actually had to still participate in normal day-to-day activities while menstruating really hurt my feelings. I think I expected some kind of ceremonious time where I would be able to lay in my bed and watch movies while someone placed a straw into my frowning mouth, letting me sip Dr. Pepper and eat an entire bag of Hershey’s kisses in peace. I still had to go to church the day when I discovered my ‘present’, and that was also the day that I was informed that women were the ONLY sex that were put through this monthly torture. I spent the day glaring at my male peers (but only in my head of course, I was still expected to smile and wave as my gut WAS LITERALLY EXPLODING INTO A FIREY INFERNO OF ANGUISH). My period was a slap in the face. A knife to my ovaries. A lesson in how the world works. The unfairness of humanity and existence.

At 11, I was forced to come to the conclusion (with the help of “The Body Book for Girls”) that life was really hard. That made me so angry! I insisted that everything in life be equal; my blood boiled when something was unfair. I wanted my life to be exactly as I believed it should be. I was like that for a while, until recently, when I was eventually able to accept that life wasn't fair.

When my senior year was pretty crap because of my recently diagnosed illnesses, I was angry for a long time-angry at my body for not working like everyone else's and angry at the world for not going through what I was going through. I remember the moment that it kind of dawned on me that bad things happen sometimes, and it's okay. It was a weird 'one-with-the-world' kind of experience that just made me feel some type of peace about my situation.

So, my all knowing 18 year old self decided some things that I believe about life.

I believe that life is hard. I believe that things happen for a reason, and that reason might be because life is hard. I believe that horrible things happen to people who don’t deserve horrible things. I believe that trials are supposed to happen to everyone. I believe that those trails may not be equally as hard for everyone.

Unfortunately, sometimes life is really hard for some people all the time. Some people’s lives are way harder than others. Although it is not super helpful to compare your problems to others, it did help me to realize that I didn’t have it that bad.

Something that really helped me accept my trials was remembering that God was on my side. I know that my Heavenly Father will NEVER leave me.

Like, ever.

Even though my periods still suck.

Cover Image Credit: Ravinder kolukunde

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13 Gross Things Girls Do That Boys Don't Know About

From a girl, about girls.

There's always talk about how gross boys are all the time, it's now time to talk about how gross maybe even how much more disgusting girls can be. It may not even be disgusting, but just weird, but we are girls. What can we say?

1. Gorilla legs.

It's not that we don't want to...okay, that was a lie. Every girl can agree that they only shave during bathing suit season when you're wearing a dress, or when you're gonna get it on. Basically, If she shaves her legs you're special.

2. When did I last wash this bra again?

We wear the same exact bra, for days, and weeks, and who knows for how long.

3. It's not just the bra's, it's the pants too.

We wear jeans and leggings like twenty times before we think about washing them.

4. We don't wash our hair every day.

Because unwashed hair is the best styling hair. Also because looking good takes too much work.

5. We are always picking at our faces, especially pimples.

As soon as we walk by a mirror, its a must. Car mirrors are awesome to pop those suckers and pluck rampant eyebrow hairs. We pop pimples like its our job.

6. We will live in your clothes.

If you somehow let your significant other or friend wear your sweatshirt you're never getting it back... and she's never taking it off. Girls will wear that sh*t until your scent is gone because we love it.

7. We poop.

Believe it or not... it happens to us too. Women don't make it as much as a show as boys do. We hide it from you and will hold it until you're not around. And you've probably received a lot of selfies on the toilet.

8. The dreaded monthly gift.

Probably the most disgusting thing to ever happen to the human body. But everyone knows about menstruating, but most guys don't understand the other things that come along with it, like the cramps that bring period farts and the nasty bowel movements and blood clots.

9. Finding hair from our head in our butt cheeks.

Yeah, it's a thing. Your head hair crawls it's way down there occasionally.

10. We smell ourselves a lot.

We are super conscious about how we smell...especially down there.

11. We let it fly.

We will hold in our farts from you, but as soon as we are alone... that's a different story. You better hope we don't get too comfortable around you too quick.

12. Sometimes we have to improvise.

Sometimes mother nature likes to come when we aren't ready, or prepared with the supplies. There are numerous occasions where we start bleeding and have to create this bundle of toilet paper and just shove it down there.

13. Looking at our panties and trying to figure out what came out.

Sometimes you just don't know for sure.

Cover Image Credit: Buzz Feed Blue

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To the Ones Who Somehow Made It Through High School And College Without Ever Dating

There is nothing wrong with you.

There is no crime in being single—in having always been single. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you.

There are very few high school relationships that last; those rare high school sweethearts that make it, in the long run, are very blessed. Most of high school dating is a game of fitting in and being just like everyone else—“the cool kids date, so I should too.” Really, not dating in high school has saved you (and me) a lot of heartaches. This is not to say that high school dating is bad or wrong; I’m just saying that it’s not necessary.

Being single is actually very beneficial. It allows you more freedom and independence to better understand yourself and to explore your own dreams and desires before adding someone else’s into the mix. How can you take part in someone else’s dreams and desires without really understanding your own? When you do end up dating, you’ll be a lot more confident with what you want and need.

Being single also gives you the chance to invest in intimate friendships that you otherwise wouldn’t develop. Friendships can be just as beneficial (or more so) than romantic relationships. Need someone to lean on, to understand you in all your crazy, to not run away on the bad days? That’s what true friends are for—and close friendships tend to last longer than most romantic relationships. You should not ever underestimate a good friendship.

People in relationships are not necessarily happier than people who are single. You can be just as content and happy single as you can be in a romantic relationship. The reverse is also true. You can be just as miserable in a romantic relationship as you can being single. Being in a romantic relationship is not going to suddenly and magically cure or solve all your problems. “Happily Ever Afters” also don’t work the way all the fairytales and stories would have us believe. Relationships are a lot of work - you have to take into consideration not just your own dreams and your own problems but also your partner’s, and that’s not a bad thing because two heads are better than one and all that, but there is a reason for such a thing as “timing.”

Dating is a lot about getting the timing right. You’re not always going to be in a good headspace for a good, healthy relationship. There have definitely been moments in my life where I strongly desired to be in a romantic relationship (especially because all of my friends were), but looking back, it was a good thing. A romantic relationship would have added a level of stress and distraction in my life that I was not ready for and probably still am not ready for. Dating is partly a waiting game, so don’t worry if you haven’t had the chance yet

From One Single Person to Another

I promise there is nothing wrong with you or me, and our time will come.

Cover Image Credit: @finduslost | Instagram

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