Dear Freshman Me,
Heads up, freshman year is starting. Like many things that you’ll do this year, it’ll be the best experience you’ll never want to do again. You’re going to end up making many life-changing decisions, but you won’t regret any of the choices you made.
Last summer, you decided to sign up for IFC rush on a whim. Little do you know, but you’ll end up joining a frat, even though you are decidedly not a typical frat guy. Trust yourself. You’ll be unsure of your decision at first, but within a month, you will know that you made the right choice.
In the first week of school, you’ll lose your girlfriend of over a year. It’ll shock you. You didn’t see it coming. Everyone close to you did, but you refused to listen to their advice. Within weeks, she’ll be with someone else. I’m warning you, this feeling won’t be good. You’ll be angry and closed off. You definitely won’t trust anyone.
That trust will be brought back out of necessity, when your friend gets into a car crash two weeks later. The shock of the call from home will never leave your head. Within weeks, he’ll die, leaving you and your friends confused and grieving.
His death will shatter your already tenuous faith in Christ. You’ll be lost, angry at God, and angry at the world. Staying true to yourself, you won’t tell anyone. You’ll simply just stop going to church, reading the Bible, and praying. No one will know, but everyone will see that you are hurting.
Doesn’t sound like such a great year so far right? Well, you’re wrong. Out of the grief and the anger will come incredible blessings.
After the breakup, you’ll grow to rely on and trust your closest friends. They’ll help you, because you chose your friends wisely. When she moves on so quickly, you’ll be hurt at first, but then you’ll realize that it is what is best for her, and you’ll respect that, even if you end up getting the short end of the stick. In that same instant, you’ll know that you needed to move on, to grow and become a different person, a better person.
Out of Blake’s death will come good. A memorial scholarship fund and a baseball tournament will be established in his name, and you will be amazed by the outpouring of support that his family will receive from the community. Your fraternity will rally around you after the loss of your friend. You’ll slowly grow to trust the guys more and more, and what started out as a rocky relationship will become a true brotherhood. Same with your PLC friends. That horrible event will bring you closer to many great people at OU. Invest in them, trust them, and grow with them.
Your faith will break, yes, but that isn’t the end of the story. God works in ways we don’t understand, and he’ll use that time to show you that you need him. After many frustrating nights, searching thoughts, fruitless readings, meaningless sermons, and hopeless prayers, you’ll find what you have been seeking: Christ. You’ve always felt him there, but you refused to let him in. In that moment, all barriers will be broken, and you’ll realize the true power of Christ, and the indescribable depth of his love for us.
At the end of the year, you’ll go to Italy. My one piece of advice for you is to check your privilege. You aren’t better than anyone. You’ll truly learn that in Italy, and you will be changed. You’ll come back on fire for justice, and with questions about what it means to be an American that don’t have easy answers.
If I could sum up my advice in one paragraph, it would sound something like this: Trust yourself, as your heart should always guide major decisions. Trust your family, because they know you better than anyone, whether you admit it or not. Trust your friends, because they have stood beside you without reservation. And above all, trust God, because he has a plan, even though you may not see it.
Boomer Sooner, and good luck.
Sincerely,
Sam
