I've been dancing since I was 4 years old. First I started with tap then jazz, ballet, lyrical, and contemporary came along. I started competing at the age of 13 and now at 18 years old, it has all come to an end. Never again will I feel the pain of pointe shoes, never again will I feel the adrenaline filled nervousness that happens right before I step on stage, and never again will I be able to feel the happiness I felt every competition weekend. With everything that I have tried in life (gymnastics, cheer leading, theater, soccer, and volleyball) dance is something that I never gave up on. I've been thinking about senior year ever since I was a freshman but I never thought about the emptiness that would come with having to say goodbye to my dance family.
For the past 14 years, I have spent countless nights, hours, minutes, and seconds, in the studio. I've waken up with my entire body in pain and suffered through my toenail falling off. Dance has seen all the sides of me, even sides my family doesn't get to see. My last recital was on May 13th. I spent the day with the people I love most, changing out of shoes and costumes, and watching my own dancers kill the stage. When Saturday night came I wasn't prepared for the thoughts that shot through my mind, you think after watching countless seniors cry as they realize that it was their last recital that I would be prepared, but I wasn't. Standing on that stage with my fellow seniors, realizing that that moment was the moment we dreaded all weekend was finally happening was a mess. We stood on stage after the recital was over crying and hugging our teachers and the friends we made. It was the most bittersweet thing I have ever experienced.
My dance career was a 14-year journey of learning and discovering. I had been with some these teachers since I was 4 years old and now I have to say goodbye them and move on to the big bad world of college. My teachers have been some of the most amazing adults I could have in my life. I will admit that while I'm writing I'm cuddled in my senior blanket crying because the thought of leaving dance behind still upsets me.
To Ms. Candy, Ms. Laurie, Ms.Kim, Ms.Sara, Ms.Brittany, and Michael. Thank you guys for not only being amazing teachers but amazing role models. I hold you guys on a high pedestal in my mind because you all truly deserve it. You have made these years so unforgettable. I know for Ms.Sara, Ms.Laurie, and Ms.Kim you have seen me grow from a young kid just trying to figure out what she's doing to a teenager who has her whole future planned out. It's going to be weird not being at the studio next year and will be hard for me to get used to.
To my fellow seniors, it has been an absolute honor and blessing to dance with you. I feel so lucky to have been able to spend time dancing with you guys. We made it to the end together, and yes it did end in tears but what else could we expect. I couldn't think of better people to end my journey with.
My decision to not join any sort of dance team in college is one that was extremely hard for me to make, but it was absolutely necessary. I can't imagine dancing with any other team. I will miss every aspect of dance dearly (yes even the pain of pointe shoes) because nothing makes me feel as good as dance does. Nothing makes me feel as whole as dance does and next year while I'm sitting in my dorm studying for a test I'll look at my senior blanket and see nothing but happy memories.
