Oftentimes, I find myself the most fearful during the perfect snippets of my life. I call them snippets because they do not come often, nor do they stay for long. The situations in life when everything seems to be going right: I'm in a great relationship, a promotion at work, and maybe even a new car. As hard as I may try, I can't stop myself from thinking-what bad is going to happen? I anticipate the unwelcome weight that is usually burdening my being and find it impossible to enjoy the moment. It is a mental and physical battle that I fight nearly every day, a darkness that tries to pull me under—a more common name for this weight is anxiety.
Do you ever have that feeling of unexpected worthlessness? The feeling that everything you're doing is suddenly wrong. You may be doing the right things; fulfilling your responsibilities for the day, taking care of obligations, but you're simply dragging into the next day. It's not that you feel this way all of the time, but suddenly, it comes out of nowhere; like a cardboard box full of tiles has planted itself on your chest. The box doesn't just go away; you're submerged under it. The box weighs you down until you're a snail; slugging to fulfill your obligations, but you do it, you manage. When the wave is high, we look forward to sleep and dread the morning. As the sun shines its light through the cracks in the blinds, we pray that the box has lifted; soon to realize it lays upon us in full force. Somehow, we are able to accept that these anxieties come and go. In several ways we find our own remedies of relief; may it be exercise, medications, or food. A means of escape becomes necessary, but we try to choose the most functional way. We learn to cope with these waves of emotions and for many reasons, we fail to share it with our peers. We think that having anxiety makes us weak or that no one would understand. Sometimes, I find myself wondering if it's just me: am I the only human who has these anxieties for no apparent reason? Although I wish that were true, it could not be further from the truth. Unfortunately, over 18 percent of adults in our society are suffering from anxiety.
The good news is: we don't have to feel this way alone. Instead of being ashamed of this supposed weakness, we can think of it as strength. We can overcome this alleged weakness and learn to carry it on our backs. When we are faced with a difficult situation we can breathe through it as we have learned to breathe through our anxiousness. We can make a choice: to use our anxiety in a positive manner rather than to let it bring negativity. So, next time you are down and out, remember that you are strong rather than weak. Remember that unlike many others, we have learned to deal with anxiety along with our daily routine. And remember, that even when you feel like you're the only person who has this problem, you're not, there are millions of us that are right here with you
