When we were younger, the thought of dating was cute. We’d write a note saying, “Do you like me? Check yes, no, or maybe.” Sometimes we got the answers we wanted, but other times not so much. Those were simpler times before we got “mature.” Once the late teens/early twenties introduced sex, it all went downhill.

Now you have to figure out if the person you’re seeing is just your friend and if so, then you’ll need to figure out how to get out of the friend zone. If not that, you’ll have to discern whether you’re dating or just friends with benefits (which is very confusing). Then if you are dating, is it a serious or causal relationship? Honestly, there are entirely too many variables in the dating world. Luckily I have three simple rules to help out with any potential heartbreak or confusion.

1. Make Your Intentions Known!

Let the person that you’re seeing know what you want from them and out of the relationship that you two are about to embark on. If you just want to mess around with no emotional involvement, then let that be known. Then if someone starts feeling any certain way, cut it off right there. Especially if both parties aren’t interested in going through with something more. If you do want a serious relationship, then let that be known as well.

2. Set Ground Rules.

Rule number two is fairly simple. Setting your own rules is vital for any sort of relationship, because every relationship is different. If you both are okay with having sex with other people, but only dating each other then let that be your business. Just make sure you put it all out there so that there’s no confusion later on. If you just want casual sex, then let that be that. I can’t tell you how many times I could’ve used this in the past. I always got with someone hoping/expecting for things to go a certain way. Then when things took a turn for the worst, I was always the one “looking stupid.”

According to the other guys, they never said they wanted to get married, meet the folks, go public, or whatever other excuse they had at the time. Then they justified themselves seeing other people, because we never said that we were only seeing each other. Talk about frustrating!

Rule number three is the hardest one to follow, because we all fall into its trap. What’s rule number three you ask?

3. Don’t Overthink It!

If you’ve both decided to just mess around with no strings attached, don’t let your mind start to play tricks on you. Sure they may linger into a kiss for longer than normal. They may hold your hand from time to time, and seem jealous if someone else shows you attention. That doesn’t matter! That definitely does NOT mean that they want to be with you. Some people just have a possessive attitude, and that’s okay. Just don’t let that possessive attitude rule you.

For instance, I have this friend… let’s call him Darren. Darren will get in a relationship with Josh and want for Josh to be completely faithful and gets angry if Josh flirts with anyone else. Meanwhile, Darren will go out and date/have sex with whoever he wants and sees nothing wrong with it. All his friends, including me, tell him that that’s not fair to Josh. He claims that is just how he’s wired. Nothing wrong with it, but Darren clearly isn’t ready to be in a seriously committed relationship with anyone. That is, unless he actually finds someone who’s okay with him doing that. Then that’s fine for their relationship.

Now these rules mainly apply to those who are in the collegiate area of their lives, but can also apply to those that are out of college and more into the advanced dating world. In my opinion, the people that are in college and around that age are the best ones to experiment and use these rules. Especially since this seems to be the "hardest" part, other than the actual homework and exams.

There, that’s it! I only have three rules when it comes to this whole “dating”/keeping it casual thing. Let’s review, shall we? In order, the rules are: Make your intentions known, set ground rules, and don’t overthink. Using these rules helps to cut out most potential heartbreak, and saves us from thinking more into a situation than we need to.