Here is what "It's OK to not be OK" Really Means

Here is what "It's OK to not be OK" Really Means

Let's define what "being okay" and "NOT being okay" means together. And let's talk about when it's good to reach out for help.


I say the phrase "It's ok to not be ok" to my friends and family all the time when they are stressed out. I offer this phrase thinking they understand what I mean by it. Recently, I have been realizing I often say phrases I might not entirely understand myself. This has led me to really explore my common phrases and pick them apart to realize their deeper meaning. Therefore, in this article I will explore those words and what they mean to me.

More or less, what does "being okay" mean?

My first thought was that being okay means being functional. For me, being functional means not having stress, anxiety, non-stop obsessive thoughts, or patterns of behavior hinder me from having a joy-filled day.

Lots of people think being okay means feeling somewhere in the middle of feeling fantastic and feeling awful – you're just living life, and nothing special is going on per-say, but it's still good.

One of my friends from work defines being okay as "living in the present with joy and or looking forward to something happening in the future."

Now, what does "not being okay" mean?

Not being okay means (to me) not being functional (as stated above), not being in a positive head-space, and not being able to pull yourself out of it on your own. It usually includes feelings of immense stress, helplessness, hopelessness, and more.

Stressing yourself out over something that hasn't happened yet (I AM SO GUILTY OF THIS. Cue frustrated facepalm).

The negative thoughts and feelings usually stem from dwelling on the past, like past mistakes or crummy moments.

When should people reach out for help if they are not okay?

You might be asking, "Wait, who said anything about reaching out for help?"

Me. Right now. It is okay to have lousy days, horrible phone conversations, whatever gets you bummed, BUT if you can't pull yourself out of this funk and it is affecting you poorly, then yes, please get help.

Because you can feel happy again and reclaim that joy that you need. So whenever you feel down and blue, reach out to a friend or family member for a comforting word, a sweet hug, or a coffee date to cheer you up and get you through the moment of sadness.

If you're "not okay" moment is more serious, like a mood or mental state that could potentially (or very quickly) reach a crisis stage where you consider hurting yourself or something else just as serious, it really is time to ask for help. Sometimes, at this stage, friends, and family alone do not cut it. I am listing professional help numbers below to assist you if you ever need those resources (for yourself or others). There is also this cool new notOK app that you could download. With just one click of a button, you could let five of your closest friends and family (and even a counselor, if you want) know you're not OK and that you need them.

Two more things, then I am done.

  • It's okay to not be okay, but it's better to be great! Whatever fills your life with joy and keeps you healthy and happy should be activities you continue doing. Be great and live life to the max, people.
  • My friend and co-worker Austin has the following advice for people who are not feeling okay:
"This is 100% proven by me. The best therapy is looking at edgy memes and (dramatic pause) listening to metal music."

Then he went on to explain that metal music is great because you get lost in the sound of the jams and if you can look at dark things in a humorous light (cuz edgy memes are dark humor memes), then nothing can probably bring your mood down. I agree, memes are great because laughter is a great antidote to stress.

Good luck, friend. Reclaim your day, make it a great one.

Professional Help Numbers

Emergency Medical Services: 9-1-1

National Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-273-8255

SAMHSA Treatment Referral Helpline: 1-877-SAMHSA7 (1-877-726-4727)

Veterans Crisis Line: 1-800-273-8255, PRESS 1

NAMI Helpline: 1-800-950-NAMI (6264)

National Domestic Violence Hotline: Call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)

Cover Image Credit:

Photo by Austin Guevara from Pexels

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12 Things Only Low-Maintenance Girls Understand

I promise we aren’t lazy, just easy going.

Sometimes low-maintenance girls are looked at as lazy or sloppy. But in reality, I think low-maintenance girls are just so confident in who they are that putting in that extra effort isn't important to them.

Here are 12 things that only low-maintenance girls understand:

1. Leggings or sweat pants and a T-shirt is your normal everyday outfit

Why spend the day uncomfortable in some tight jeans or mini skirt when you can lounge around in some comfy clothes? We aren't here to impress anyone, we are just trying to sit back and chill.

2. Makeup is a special occasion

If you catch a low-maintenance girl with makeup on, take it as a compliment. We are trying to touch our face and rub our eyes as much as we'd like without makeup getting in the way. Not to mention, we wouldn't dare spend over $15 on some foundation.

3. We would rather stay in with a movie then go out for the evening

Something low-key and low stress always sounds better than spending the time, and the money, for a night out. I am perfectly content with taking advantage of my $7.99 monthly payment for Netflix.

4. You're always the first one ready

While your friends spend hours doing their hair, makeup and then finding the perfect outfit, you sit around and wait. Your 10 minutes thrown-together-look gives you time to nap while everyone else takes their sweet time.

5. When you say you "don't care what we do," you really don't care

Seriously, a date night off the McDonald's dollar menu is fine by me. I am not expecting you to wine and dine me on a big extravagant evening, I'm just trying to get a Big Mac in my mouth.

6. Your messy bun isn't a fashion statement, it's actually just your hairstyle

We aren't about to spend time curling or straightening our hair everyday. Every day is a good day to throw your hair up into a ponytail or bun.

7. The extent of your jewelry collection is one pair of earrings and maybe a necklace

Who needs more than one pair of earrings? Diamond studs match everything… right?

8. And your shoe collection is even smaller

Should I wear flip-flops or Converse?

9. Shopping isn't exactly your favorite thing to do

Who has patience for finding the perfect designer brands or finding the best fit? I am perfectly content with my T-shirts and leggings. One size fits all.

10. Your favorite gifts are the sentimental ones, not the expensive ones

A homemade card or a small gift that makes someone think of you is forever better and more meaningful than an expensive present. I don't want your money, I just want to know you thought of me.

11. You don't put in the effort to chase after a guy

I'm awesome and I know it. If a guy is worth it enough to be in my life, he can come after me. I am not down for any games or players. Just someone who embraces my low-maintenance qualities.

12. You are always the first person to help someone out

Giving your friends a ride or lending them two dollars isn't a huge deal. Just helping someone out gives you peace of mind. Everyone should have time to help a homie out.

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3 AMAZING Reasons To Cheat On Your Significant Other

It's super easy!


Sike. Gotcha.

1. There aren't any

Seriously? You actually thought I would condone this pathetic, childish, immature, unfaithful behavior? Shame on you.

If you were actually looking for reasons to cheat on your partner, thinking this link would help you, shame on you.

2. Don't be a piece of shit

Don't do it. Even if you think they deserve it because they cheated on you or YOU THINK they cheated, don't lower yourself to that asinine level. Be mature.

But if YOU are thinking about cheating, or currently are in any way, you're an ass. She/he can do SO much better without you. The best thing to do if you want to mess around with people that don't matter is just to leave. You're already in a different mind set, not caring about your S/O's feelings, so why drag them on? Be mature.

3. Leave them if they do

To those who have been cheated on but chose to stay with them: you're an idiot. I don't care what the circumstances are. If they cheated, you know they are fully capable of doing it again. If anything, they just figured out new ways to get away with it better or longer.

Get out of that shitty relationship.


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