The process of healing is anything but a simple uphill climb. There are relapses, flashbacks and steps backward a plenty; however, those do not signify defeat or failure. It's perfectly OK to slip up sometimes. We're only human. Below are a few steps to keep in mind while on the journey to recovery.
1. Positive self-talk.
Though it may seem silly, giving yourself compliments can be incredibly helpful for your mental health and self-esteem. It may feel strange at first, but the results are lovely. You don't need to have Shakespearean style soliloquies (though if that's what you want, then go for it) to accomplish this. A simple "I look really great today" will do. And the compliments don't need to be solely on appearance; you can give yourself credit for that awesome paper you wrote, or even just getting out of bed! Remember, no victory is too small.
2. Know your limits.
Sometimes, you just can't make it through the full day without a flashback or relapse, and there is nothing wrong with that. If you can feel yourself beginning to fall into the dark place, don't be afraid to excuse yourself from whatever it is you're doing. Even a simple trip to the bathroom can help you work the bad thoughts out of your system. Your mental health is more important than missing notes or a discussion. If you can't step out, then try grounding techniques to help calm yourself down.
3. Pace yourself.
A part of healing is going past initial feelings of anxiety and telling yourself, "I can do it." While this is a brilliant way to build strength, you don't need to do this every single time. It's OK to avoid a situation where you know your mental health may be at risk. Bravery is admirable, but it's not worth forcing yourself to sit through something potentially harmful. If a part of you thinks that you're not ready, then listen to that and wait until you are.
4. Spend time with friends.
Surrounding yourself with those who care for you can be a useful reminder that you matter. While you shouldn't solely rely on others to give you a sense of purpose, it's still important to know that you're not alone. There are people who love you and care for you. Though your healing is very personal, you don't have to do it by yourself.
5. Don't be afraid to ask for help.
It's not uncommon for those who've gone through trauma to want to do everything on their own. Chances are it is another human's fault that they're wounded, so they're reluctant to trust anyone. This can be incredibly difficult to get over. I won't say let your guard down to every new face who comes your way. but don't decline help when it's offered. Remember that needing help is never a sign of weakness. You are strong.
Please follow these steps to the best of your ability if you are hurting. Don't ever doubt that you are worthy of love and healing. Most of all, keep in mind that you will get better.
