Transitioning from high school to college is a daunting task – one that is often accompanied by anxiety and fear. College takes you by surprise. No one is ever ready to take on such a big change. Being stripped of your support system and placed in a different environment is an overwhelming combination. While there’s no way to prepare for the emotional rollercoaster that is arriving on campus, here is some reassuring advice that will help ease freshman year stress.
1. During your first week, everyone is utterly terrified. It’s not just you.
When you arrive on campus, it may seem like everyone is exuding a care-free attitude, excitement and eagerness. As convincing as this may be, take it for what it is: a front. During the first week, everyone is primarily worried about first impressions and forming relationships. People may seem in high spirits, but everyone is internally struggling. Everyone has something or someone they miss from home, and everyone is still figuring out what being at college means. For some people, this struggle may come a bit later. For others, the realization hits immediately. Either way, everyone is undergoing a major change and everyone is fearful, not just you.
2. You’re going to feel like your friends and family are a million miles away. But you’ll soon realize that they’re just a text or phone call away.
When your family leaves you on move-in day and you’re left all alone, it feels like a mixture of heartbreak and panic. The distance seems so much larger than it is. You feel completely alone. You feel like you can’t vent to anyone because no one knows you well enough to understand you. You begin to think that your relationships with your friends and family are going to vastly change. You feel like you lost everything you had. You feel incredibly vulnerable and lonely. You won’t want to worry your loved ones, so you’ll refrain from calling or texting. You don’t want to come off as antisocial or pessimistic, so you’ll tag along with people you barely know and try to smile. You’ll probably fight back tears sometimes, or all the time. Just remember that you can always reach out to friends and family. Their lives go on just like normal, and they miss you just as much. After reaching out to them, you’ll feel much better.
3. It may seem like you’re starting a new life away from home, but you’ll be home more than you realize.
Even though your campus will be your primary residence, you’ll be back for the holidays. That includes a month over winter break and three months over the summer. You won’t be gone forever. Your home will still be there when you get back. When you get to college, you get so caught up in everything that you don’t realize how soon and how often you’ll be going back home. Don't worry, you'll be reunited with your cat in no time.
4. You'll think you won’t connect with anybody. You will.
There’s somebody for everybody. When you visit colleges, you feel like an outsider. You feel like everyone there is so different from you, and you worry whether you’ll actually make friends. You’re not sure that you can connect with anybody like you connect with your best friend from home. You may not form the same kinds of relationships you had with people from home, but you’ll form new relationships that will shape your college experience. College is a melting pot of so many different kinds of people – you’re bound to meet someone that you connect with about something. Just force yourself to talk to people and you’ll soon find common interests. It may be awkward and weird, but it’ll be worth it.
5. You don’t have to have your whole life and career plan figured out.
This one is constantly repeated, but it cannot be said enough. Going into college undecided is completely acceptable and normal. But even if you do know your major, don’t think that you have to know exactly what you’re going to do with that major. College is a time to be confused and explore your interests. You will become more in tune with your talents and aspirations as time goes on. Courses you take, clubs you join, people you hang out with, professors you have and opportunities that arise will all affect the path you take. Don’t stress too much about your future. Think about it enough to stay on track, but don’t obsess over it to the point of a breakdown.
6. Drinking and partying isn’t as prevalent as it seems to be.
When most people hear the word “college,” they tend to think of party scenes and drunk 20-somethings. But that’s not all college is. At any college you go to, you can find a group of people that fit your lifestyle choices. If you want those traditional college experiences, you can find people to do those things with. And if those kinds of experiences don’t appeal to you, you can find people to abstain from those things with, too. It’s all about the people you surround yourself with.
7. Your roommate won’t be completely terrible. They might actually be pretty great.
Well, at least in most cases. It’s unlikely that your roommate will dislike you from the start. You just need to start off on a good foot by being friendly and relating over how awkward the experience is. Also, you must remember that living with someone is a two-way street and communication is key. Never bottle up feelings to the point of tension. Just be courteous to them and they will be courteous to you. And don’t take things too seriously. Give the other person a break sometimes. Don’t let every little thing get to you and remember that they’re a person with feelings, too. During your first few weeks, your roommate is going to be your go-to person to vent to, to gossip with, and to go to everything with. Use this time to bond with them and hopefully build a lasting friendship.
8. You’re going to learn so much and grow so much.
College opens your mind. It teaches you how to think. It makes you question the motivations behind your beliefs and forces you to confront yourself. It educates you about the world and makes you a well-rounded member of the global community. It challenges you in the most rewarding ways. It fosters independence, perseverance and determination. While college should be taken in for the whole experience, learning as much as possible should be your top priority. College isn’t all about socializing – it’s more about studying.
