First, let me begin by clarifying that my grandparents were not willingly a non-existent part of my life. Two of my grandparents, unfortunately, passed away before I was born. One passed away when I was just a young boy. And the last one passed away just a few years ago, but was suffering from a severe case of Alzheimer’s for over ten years. So, as you now know, I basically grew up without grandparents.
Growing up this way, I always had a soft spot for my parents. Having such a strong relationship with my own parents, I couldn’t imagine how it felt for them not having theirs. It also doesn’t help that we, as a family, grew up alone. It has always been just my parents, my siblings and me. Although we’re grateful enough that we get to see my family every single year and have such strong relationships with them, they still live halfway around the world. With my dad working, my mom was forced to raise three children on her own, a task where typically a relative would step in to help, or perhaps a grandparent.
I always yearned to see what it felt like to have a relationship with your grandparents. I could never relate when people would say, “I love going to Grandma’s house because she always gives me money,” or, “My Grandma gets so mad when I don’t eat” (granted, the eating part was taken care of more than graciously by my mom). I always thought how fun it would be to tell my mom or dad that they still have someone they have to listen to, or to convince a grandparent to reprimand one of them.
I guess growing up this way gave me a soft spot for old people too. I can sit and talk to other people’s grandparents for hours, and not feel any urge to leave. They possess so much firsthand knowledge on life and an abundance of stories to tell. I always wondered what it felt like to hear those stories come from my own grandparents.
What always gets me is hearing or seeing that people my age don’t care to have relationships with their grandparents. It boggles my mind when I see that people have such short tempers with them. How could you treat a love that is naturally unconditional and innocent so maliciously?
In a way, growing up without grandparents has made me respect and love my parents harder and greater. I can’t wait to one day have my kids build a relationship I never got the chance to have. I will always lack what that type of love feels like, but I’m grateful to say that the love my parents show me is more than enough.
