10 Things You Learn From Going Back To A Toxic Relationship

10 Things You Learn From Going Back To A Toxic Relationship

Change doesn't just magically happen overnight.

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Trust me, I know the feeling when you start talking to an ex-significant other again and it *feels* like the magic is still there. So you give it another try and you realize that absolutely nothing has changed and you need to get out as fast as possible.

1. Actions speak louder than words.

Someone can say the right things all that they want, but at the end of the day it's how they treat you and what they do to show you they mean their words that matters. I know how hard it is to look past what they text you, but all in all you need to remember that if they truly cared they would treat you better.

2. Maybe not everyone deserves a second chance.

Sure, some people are capable of change. However, unfortunately, many people are going to tell you what you want to hear and then they won't make the changes. Be careful when deciding who to let back in your life and who to stay away from; some people are truly incapable of changing.

3. If they were going to treat you right, they would have done so the first time.

As hard as it is to hear this, it's true. Someone is going to treat you right from the start if they want to be with you. They'll show you that they want to be with you, and they would try their hardest not to lose you.

4. If you have to repeatedly ask for someone to make time for you, they're not the one.

If someone wants to see you then they're going to make time for you. End of story. If you have to ask someone over and over what they're doing and if they have time for you, then they are not good for you at all. This goes back to the fact that actions speak louder than words. Someone can tell you how much they want to see you, but if they don't end up seeing you it doesn't really mean anything.

5. The actions that ruined the relationship in the first place are still going to be there.

As much as you can say that you're starting with a clean slate, the past is always going to be there in the back of your mind. If they cheated on you in the past, you're always going to worry that they're cheating on you again. It's unavoidable.

6. You'll fall back into old habits quickly.

Although the first few days or even weeks may feel great, it's the 'honeymoon' phase. You're getting used to each other again and trying extra hard to make the other person happy. However, one small slip up and you're in an argument. One argument turns into a week long fight which leaves both people unhappy.

7. It's going to be twice as hard to walk away.

Of course you walked away the first time and you instantly felt better, but somehow you let this person back into your life again. This time, you wanted it to work twice as much as you did the first time because you've already felt the pain of the loss once before. So in turn, it's going to be even harder to walk away this time.

8. Your friends are going to question your decisions.

Your friends were there for you the first time and they're still here for you now, so they watched you suffer through the breakup the first time and now they're wondering what in the world you were thinking. Although they'll support you, you'll know that they don't agree with you going back to a toxic relationship because no one wants their friends to be in an unhappy situation.

9. There's a lot that's happened that you don't know about.

No matter how much time has passed, you've missed a portion of each other's lives. You're going to be missing pieces of their life which won't make you feel too great. Some stuff will remain a secret and other stuff you won't like. At the end of the day, it's still a toxic situation.

10. It wasn't worth it.

A toxic relationship is always going to be a toxic relationship. The flaws and problems are always going to be there whether they're present or in the back of your mind. It's the unfortunate truth, but it's just a bunch of heartbreak for nothing.

Focus on building healthy relationships with new people. It's unlikely that a former toxic relationship is going to be able to make such a drastic change into a healthy relationship. It's too much of a strain on your emotions to put yourself through that for a second or maybe even a third time. It's time to move on and be happy.

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13 Movies Every Couple Needs To Watch Before They Get Married

Let's be honest, Rachel McAdams is in all the best love stories.

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These 13 movies are the foundation of any long-lasting relationship, and I'm not joking. Each movie will show you something new about your partner, and make you ask each other the hard questions. How many kids do you want and how are you going to raise them? What would happen if you got into a horrible accident? Some are less serious though, like what if you could time travel?

I promise that not every one of these movies is a Nicholas Sparks classic, and I also promise that not every movie has Rachel McAdams in it!

1. "The Time Traveler's Wife"

This movie is both heartbreaking and amazing.

2. "About Time"

Let's be honest, Rachel McAdams is in all the best love stories. It's on Netflix right now, so grab some snacks and turn it on!

3. "Like Crazy"

This infamous Tumblr gif came from "Like Crazy." It's about a couple who goes long distance and build their life together. I used to cry every time I watched it, and I'm no crier! It also has the (now famous) Felicity Jones in it.

4. "The Notebook"

Every girl wants this kind of love.

5. "The Last Song"

Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth are literally married now so if that isn't good luck, I don't know what is.

6. "Safe Haven"

You guessed it! This is another Nicholas Sparks classic. This movie has a dark twist as well, which men will love.

7. "Inside Out"

You may be thinking that this one is a bit weird. Well, this movie will help both you and your partner understand each other's emotions better.

8. "The Choice"

This movie is great because the female lead is feisty and extremely intelligent, which usually doesn't happen in love stories. How do you keep the love alive with a woman who is hard to get, and even harder to keep entertained?

9. "The Longest Ride"

Originally I could not stand the main female lead (Britt Robertson) but now she is in one of my favorite shows (For The People), so I have no choice. This movie had me on the end of my seat, and as a rom-com it is a must.

10. "The Age Of Adaline"

I began loving the name 'Adaline' thanks to this movie. This unlikely love story and self love journey really gets me.

11. "The Vow"

Imagine falling in love with someone and building a life, but an accident forces you to start all over?

12. "Titanic"

If they don't have any sort of reaction to this movie, they are probably not the one for you.

13. "Yours, Mine, & Ours"

Yours, Mine, & Ours is a true classic. Are you Helen or Frank Beardsley? You should figure that out before you tie the knot!

You're welcome!

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41 Thank-Yous To My Boyfriend Who Stood By My Side For Three Semesters And Graduation

Life will be scary and difficult sometimes, but as long as you're there to hold my hand, I know that I will always be OK.

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These last several semesters at college, I've learned so much and I've changed so much, all because of one person. A person that came at a time when things were going downhill, and completely flipped my life around. I will never forget how terrible I felt before I met you, and how much better I am with you by my side. Truly, I don't know where I would be without you. And that's why it will always be impossible to thank you enough for everything that you have done for me.

But you do deserve to know how much of an impact you have on me.

1. Thank you for being my shoulder to cry on when I was struggling to get through this last semester.

2. Thank you for always listening to me rant about problems I was having with my friends.

3. Thank you for never getting tired of me talking about the same things over and over again.

4. Thank you for never acting like my past trauma was baggage or a burden.

5. Thank you for trying your best to understand and to be considerate of my anxiety.

6. Thank you for being patient with me when I take so long to process everything and sort out my emotions.

7. Thank you for dealing with my mood swings and intense emotions.

8. Thank you for never judging me over things I get embarrassed about.

9. Thank you for sharing your opinions with me, even when I didn't want to hear them, but I needed to hear them.

10. Thank you for opening my eyes to toxic behavior that I was blind to.

11. Thank you for always looking out for my health and well-being, and my future.

12. Thank you for helping me grow up and mature.

13. Thank you for always wanting to talk things out.

14. Thank you for making me feel important.

15. Thank you for giving me a reason to live.

16. Thank you for showing me what true love is.

17. Thank you for being my best friend and partner in life.

18. Thank you for breaking my walls down but never breaking a promise.

19. Thank you for keeping my heart safe.

20. Thank you for giving me endless reassurance.

21. Thank you for never making me worry about the fate of our relationship.

22. Thank you for always putting me first.

23. Thank you for being loyal and committed to me.

24. Thank you for all of the memories and adventures.

25. Thank you for never getting annoyed about taking photos.

26. Thank you for the best summer of my life.

27. Thank you for making college a much better experience for me.

28. Thank you for always putting a smile on my face.

29. Thank you for always catering to me and trying to make me happy.

30. Thank you for all the little favors you do for me and everything else you might think goes unnoticed (but trust me, I notice and I appreciate it so much).

31. Thank you for supporting everything that I'm passionate about.

32. Thank you for always making an effort to change.

33. Thank you for always forgiving me when I make (loads of) mistakes.

34. Thank you for being a good influence on me.

35. Thank you for being my role model and inspiring me to be more like you.

36. Thank you for the amount of time, effort, and love that you've put into our relationship.

37. Thank you for shaping my future.

38. Thank you for making me so hopeful and excited about everything that we are going to do throughout our life together.

39. Thank you for thinking that I'm worth it.

40. Thank you for wanting to get married, have kids, and spend your life with me.

41. Thank you for making my dreams come true.

Now that we've graduated, for the first time, we're dealing with the fact that we don't have a set path laid out for us. Real life is more than what we're used to. We might struggle to find jobs. Heck, we might find jobs but hate them. It might take forever to save up money. Things might not go according to how we planned them in our heads. We're going to have to juggle a bunch of different elements all at once. Life will be scary and difficult sometimes, but as long as you're there to hold my hand, I know that I will always be OK.

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