I’ve always wanted to write this article, but I was never really sure how to start. Let me begin by saying, I’m not gonna lie, sometimes I’m a pretty negative person. I tend to have bad luck, and when things go wrong I usually get pretty upset. I like things to go super smoothly (who doesn’t?) and sometimes having to readjust when they don’t can be hard. After a week full of never-ending bad days, I decided I was going to have a stop to this. I had an epiphany, and I realized something very, very important—happiness is a choice.

Yeah, you may have heard this before. Yeah, this may seem obvious, but in my day-to-day life I honestly never really thought about this. Happiness truly is a choice -- a personal choice, and one that you must willingly pursue. Basically, I’ve come to the realization that after a bad day, you either can mope about it or choose to pick yourself back up and keep going. So many days when I’ve had a “bad day,” I let that deter my mood for the rest of that day and sometimes a few days after. This, obviously, is incredibly stupid and unproductive, but I don’t do this consciously. Honestly, I don’t even really realize how I’m continuing to be negative sometimes, but I’ll question “Why can’t I get out of this bad mood?” I’ve finally realized, this bad mood was my own fault. So, with my new method of “choosing happiness” I have come up with a way to conquer my bad moods. First, I’m going to allow myself to get upset about whatever happened. I’m not going to brush everything off and tell myself not to worry about it—because quite frankly I’m allowed to be upset sometimes. In the end, it’s how you choose to manage this upset feeling after-the-fact that makes all the difference. From this point on, after getting my frustration and anger out, I’m going to just try and choose a positive mindset, count my blessings, and move on.

I’m not stopping there. I’ve also realized that I need to choose what makes me happy on a day to day basis. This is so broad, but has so many implications. For example, I’m going to stop doing the things that I feel obligated to just for that reason alone. Because, you know what, if you don’t feel like doing something—then just don’t. Don’t feel like others are pressuring you, or that you have to please them. I’m not saying don’t do things you are actually obligated to do (work, homework, cleaning, etc.), but merely all those little things we do despite really not wanting to. You know what I’m talking about. Instead of doing things because you feel pressured or obligated to, start choosing to do things that you know will make you happy. Sometimes it really is good to push yourself to do things and get out of your comfort zone, yes, but on those nights you really just don’t wanna go anywhere and wanna sit inside and watch movies all night—take that cue from yourself and actually stay in and just watch movies. Pick little things each day that makes you happy. This could be as simple as buying yourself your favorite coffee, sitting down to your favorite show after a long day, or eating that cookie you really, really want. Choose you, because why weren’t you in the first place?

For me, I’ve started to take a positive spin on the things I actually do need to do. I’m exercising in ways I actually enjoy, and I’ve stopped running endlessly on the treadmill, because quite frankly, I hate running. I’ve started approaching homework with a better attitude, realizing that if I finish it I can do what actually makes me happy afterwards. I’ve said no to things I didn’t want to do, yes to things I did. I’ve chosen me, and I’ve chosen my own happiness even in life’s daily obligations, and it’s been much more simple than I thought it would be. I’ve also realized the more negative people in my life can tend to really bring me down, and that these people should be taken with a grain of salt.

If you’re anything like me, this idea may make you initially nervous. I tend to be more of a people pleaser, and doing things “for myself alone” made me feel somewhat selfish. After much contemplation, I realized that was an entirely stupid notion. I think as people, sometimes we feel weird doing things for ourselves, or choosing to do things without the approval of others. It’s out of a good heart that we do this, as we always want to put others before ourselves. However, realize there is a balance, and if you always put others in front of you, you may be doing it to the extent of doing yourself a disservice. Know that your own happiness is worth pursuing, and that you are allowed to do completely unapologetically.

In conclusion, this article, for me, has been kind of a self-realization. As I grow older, I really have been hit with a lot more complications and obligations. How I choose to approach and attack these complications and obligations in my daily life, however, is how I truly what will define my own outlook and happiness in these situations. I don’t deserve to be anything but happy (what a concept, right?), and in doing this I have learned more about myself and my self worth. I hope this may assist others who may have the same issue, and I urge each of you to start doing what makes you happy. Not your parents, not your friends, or your teachers. Find things in daily life that you enjoy and that make life for you a little more worthwhile. Recognize the negativity in your life, and choose to not acknowledge it. In the end, your happiness if your choice, so start choosing it for no one but yourself.