I've had people come up to me and ask me how I'm so open and honest with myself. It wasn't always this way. I used to be ashamed of myself. I hated my personality, I was so insecure about my looks, I was judgemental, the list goes on. I noticed how bitter I was becoming. I grew up getting bullied, but now I was bullying myself. It's not the life I wanted for myself.

I was inspired to love myself by the black community online. They loved themselves so much. Called themselves "Queens", cheered each other on. That's the kind of positivity I wanted in my life.

It's been two years since I started working on self-love. Over the past two years, these five things have truly helped me be where I am today.

KNOW WHO YOU ARE

Point out everything about yourself. Make a list of all your great characteristics along with your least favorite. Once you know who you are, you won't worry who others think you are.

Once you identify your unfavorable characteristics, make goals to improve them one by one.

I had an awful habit when it came to talking about people. I didn't like that I didn't, but I was so accustomed to doing it that I didn't know how to stop. I decided to unfollow the people I would talk about on social media. It wasn't because I was intolerant, but because I needed to accept myself first. There was no need for me to be bitter about what other people were posting on social media. I slowly took away the things that created flaws in my character.

Currently, I'm gradually introducing them back into my life. I stepped away from Twitter until two months ago. I started posting more selfies on Instagram, I started becoming active on facebook again. I confronted people I gossiped about, to make amends. I caught myself, and I stopped myself.

I'm still improving who I am day by day.

LOVE WHO YOU ARE

Once you know yourself accept you, love yourself. Love your "flaws", whether they're physical or mental.

Accepting yourself physically might seem superficial but trust me it changes your whole attitude. You wear whatever you want, there no such thing as a "body type" when it comes to outfits.

When you accept yourself physically, no one can say anything to bring you down.

The other day my brother and I got into a fight and he made a comment about my double chin. I looked back at him and said "Double?! Last time I checked I had at least 3 chins!"

He looked so confused, he thought he was trying to insult me, but it backfired.

COMPLIMENT YOURSELF

This idea is so stigmatized. The whole idea of being "cocky" or "narcissistic" is so overrated. Wake up in the morning and tell yourself how good you look in the morning. Use your midday bathroom break to look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself how great you look.

Don't hold back from posting selfies. No one takes just ONE selfie on a good day right? Post all your selfies, make the caption about how good you look. Post another selfie after that and talk about how you loved yourself in both so much you didn't want to upload just one.

Once you start loving yourself and complementing yourself it's so easy to love and accept and complement everyone else. You'll notice yourself randomly writing to people you don't talk to daily and telling them how beautiful they are. And that's one of the many joys of being content with your own being.

CREATE A LOVING COMMUNITY

End toxic relationships. Sometimes ending a relationship is hard because of the years put into it. Just because someone has been in your life for five years, doesn't mean they should stay there. Find relationships that build you up. A new friend can benefit you more than a friend you've had for years.

Think about it. Why would you want anyone in your life if they aren't helping you be better than you already are?

FORGIVE YOURSELF

The last and most important way to live happy with yourself is to always forgive yourself.

If you've made mistakes, know it's okay. Everyone makes mistakes. No mistake is big enough that you can't change the outcome of it. When you acknowledge and accept your mistakes it helps everyone around you. When you know that you can make mistakes, you realize so is everyone else. Forgiving yourself not only helps you accept yourself, but it makes you that accepting being that everyone else wants to surround themselves with.